DISCLAIMER: The Star Trek characters are the property of Paramount Studios, Inc and Viacom. The story contents are the creation and property of Djinn and are copyright (c) 2024 by Djinn. This story is Rated R.

Cold Shoulder

by Djinn

 

1.

 

Shaw wandered the office as Geordi talked and B'Elanna chimed in. It was rude of him to not just sit down the way they wanted him to, but he didn't give a flying one.

 

Fuck them for pulling him out of a perfectly boring meeting to lay this on him.

 

"Are you even listening, Liam?" Geordi sounded disappointed in him, and the old Liam would have given a shit about that.

 

"He's listening." B'Elanna walked over to him. "Liam, you were the one good thing about the Academy before I dropped out. I know you, and I also know what it's like to work with her—to try to manage her."

 

"Operative word: try."

 

"We lost so many engineers during the Borg attack."

 

"Then put me on any other ship."

 

"No one knows that one like you do." Geordi had the tone he used when he complimented Shaw on the state of his ship.

 

The old Shaw would have rolled over and played nice. The old Shaw, who hadn't been gunned down by one of his crew, who hadn't been stuffed into a stasis chamber by Ohk when she found him on the maintenance deck, who hadn't been brought back to fucking life through conventional medical methods not, thank fuck, Hansen's nanoprobes, which he'd been told were on the table as a possibility.

 

Would he be Borg if they had been used? Fucking irony if so.

 

The thing was: he'd been ready to go. And now that he was alive again, he was enjoying being among the living, but on Earth. Having a life and sleeping with any woman who caught his fancy but wasn't in Starfleet.

 

He wasn't a dick with them. He made it clear he had just left a long-term relationship—so it was with his ship and crew? It still counted—and all he wanted was some fun.

 

He was actually having fun. No one was getting hurt. Maybe someday he'd settle down if he found the right woman.

 

But to go back to that ship with that captain? Fuck him. "I could retire."

 

"Janeway would just reactivate you." B'Elanna said softly.

 

"Hey, I read that clause. Had it amended."

 

"She won't care."

 

He looked at Geordi who sort of shrugged and nodded.

 

"Fuck. Have you even cleared this with Hansen?"

 

"Seven." B'Elanna's voice was firm and he knew she sort of liked Seven. Maybe even really liked her. He'd never been clear on that.

 

"Did she get the name changed in the fucking database yet?"

 

"It's in the works."

 

"Then she's still Annika Hansen. Fuck her. And you didn't answer my question. You think I want to be on her ship with a hostile version of her? It was hell having her serve next to me wanting to make a good impression." And then not. Not caring because she'd decided he was a dick and he'd decided she was a pain in the ass to manage.

 

But he'd seen her fucking potential. He could appreciate her good sides, even recommend her for the captaincy. He just didn't want to be anywhere near her again.

 

"Hell's a bit strong. She's a handful. I get it."

 

"The story she writes is going to be great." Geordi grinned at him, like repeating his performance review of her would make it all okay.

 

"The book. The book she writes. But I don't want to be a character in said book. Write me out, Admirals."

 

"Love hearing that rank. Commodore is so..." Geordi gave him a stern look when he realized he'd been distracted—Shaw had known he would be. "I'm deputy head of Engineering. I want you on that ship."

 

"And I'm head of it, and I want you there too. And so does our esteemed CinC."

 

He closed his eyes. "I'm not telling Hansen. More importantly, if I do this, I don't answer to her."

 

"Liam, come on." B'Elanna rolled her eyes. "Neither of us can manage you from here."

 

"Give her all the input on my performance you want. Let her write me up until her hand falls off. But you do my evals, not her. That's my fucking line in the sand."

 

"I'm fine with that, but I'll leave you two to figure out the details." Geordi turned off his desk lamp and got up. "I'm late for dinner."

 

As he left the Engineering Suite, B'Elanna pulled Shaw into her office. She typed something and said, "Tom will be down soon. He's bringing scotch."

 

"Not going to make it better. I gave her my ship, Bey. And my blessing. Why does she get to have me?"

 

"Because she needs you. She just doesn't know it. And that ship needs you and we both know that."

 

He nodded, accepting defeat in this. "I was having fun dating."

 

"Is that what you call it? Did you see any of them for more than one screw—I mean date?"

 

"Wow, did I make the gossip chain?"

 

"You did. Nice of you to not shit in the Command nest. But you've been invited to a lot of parties and you're never with the same woman twice."

 

He couldn't meet her eyes. "It's just easier."

 

"Easier than what?" Her smile is knowing. "Easier than a certain blue-eyed blonde we both know?"

 

"I hate her."

 

"Uh huh. And she hates you. You've both made that more than clear."

 

"Besides, she's with Raffi."

 

"Not a hundred percent sure of that."

 

He hated the surge of hope he felt. God damn it—he fucking hated Hansen. Had since Janeway shoved her down his throat. Told him when he resisted taking Hansen that he'd do it if he wanted to get any of his other picks approved. He hated her and he was not happy that her relationship might be tanking.

 

"If you could see your face, Liam."

 

"Fuck you, Bey."

 

"Do not talk to my better half that way, you dipshit." Tom pulled him into a hug, with plenty of backslaps, some a little hard. Then he made a great show of pouring out the scotch and passing it around. "So are we talking about a certain Borg?"

 

"Ex-Borg," he said almost by rote. He'd gotten so used to saying that to anyone they were interacting with who looked askance at her implants.

 

Tom snickered.

 

"Shut up, Mr. Torres."

 

"Low blow, Shaw." He closed his eyes as he sipped the scotch. "Sublime."

 

B'Elanna rolled her eyes. "That's a Kathryn word. You're clearly spending too much time with her."

 

"I'm her chief of staff. It's in my job description to do that."

 

Shaw took a sip and had to admit it was indeed sublime. "I don't want to be on that ship again. Not with the new name. Not with the new captain."

 

"Who you recommended..."

 

"Fuck you, Bey." He looked at Tom to see what he was going to say.

 

"Nope, on your side this time, Liam." He started to laugh. "You should have seen B'Elanna and Seven when she first came on board. Oh my god."

 

"Like water and oil?"

 

B'Elanna latched. "More like gasoline and a match—a very annoying Borg match."

 

Tom nodded. "There were some truly epic arguments. B'Elanna won, of course." In a stage whisper he said, "I'm required to say that. Seven held her own."

 

"Fuck you, Tom."

 

"Liam's potty mouth is rubbing off on you, darling. Talk like that to me in bed and maybe we'll make another baby."

 

"No, we won't. Unless you're going to stay home with it. I'm too old."

 

"And you love this job," Shaw said as he poured himself a little more then checked the label to see what it was. "You always get the best stuff, Tom."

 

"I always do. Starting with my wife." Tom smiled at her in the sweetest way.

 

She rolled her eyes, but her smile was soft.

 

"You two are my role models for a happy marriage."

 

"Oh, were you thinking of marriage?" She laughed at his expression. "The two of you would make beautiful babies—if you weren't so fucking old."

 

"Fuck you, Bey. For the baby part, not the old part. I own that proudly." There was a time, right after Wolf 359, he wasn't sure he'd even get to old age.

 

And now, here he was. "Seven's going to be so pissed off."

 

"Yeah. Yeah, she is." Tom lifted his glass. "To the man with sufficient skills with an engine to soothe the savage beast."

 

"Or at least make her leave you alone. She needs you, Liam. Just keep telling yourself that. Make it a goddamned mantra if you need to. But you'll be on that ship in two weeks when Seven's back for meetings."

 

"I've got a lot of living to do in those two weeks then."

 

"You mean a lot of women?" Tom smirked.

 

B'Elanna grabbed the bottle and refilled her glass. "I don't want to know."

 

##

 

Seven sat on the bed, leaning against the headboard, clutching the cashmere throw Shaw had left behind.

 

It wasn't that it was his; it was that it was so damn soft and warmed up so nicely where it lay against her. She could ball it up and clutch it this way—pour a silent scream into it even though she was sitting completely still.

 

As Raffi packed up her shit. Which all fit in a tiny backpack.

 

"That's it? That's all you have?" She was sure there'd been more when this mission started.

 

Or more accurately, when they were still in Space Dock. They'd been fine when they both had the ability to get the hell away from each other. This was going like the other two times—except that this time it was Raffi leaving her.

 

Which, if she was honest with herself, she always expected Raffi to do. Maybe that was why she'd run the other two times? So Raffi couldn't get sick of her—couldn't figure out how broken she was.

 

And how not broken Raffi was, despite how she often spoke of her past.

 

Raffi looked sheepish but just nodded.

 

"Have you been moving stuff out?" Why did that hurt so much? They hadn't even talked about this until now and Raffi had already been abandoning her.

 

No, fuck, not abandoning. People left and that's just how life was. Her parents, Chakotay, Kathryn, everyone else she'd known from the ship, Picard after the first and second mission—he'd had no idea where the fuck she was and hadn't seemed to care.

 

And Shaw. Gave her a review so good it made her cry and then wouldn't even meet so she could apologize.

 

"We're good, Hansen," was all he'd said. Using the name she hated to send her running in the opposite direction no doubt.

 

Or maybe he used it solely out of muscle memory. Several years of calling her that—in every conceivable tone.

 

Well, not every conceivable tone.

 

Fuck, she had to focus. Shaw was long gone. The woman in front of her wasn't going anywhere other than back to her quarters full time.

 

And maybe down to Earth since they were here for a few days. Down to cruise the clubs they'd both liked in their single days.

 

To find someone new.

 

But that was okay. Because she and Raffi were friends and friends supported each other's choices even if meant finding a new lover to replace her.

 

It was okay because Raffi was a wonderful first officer. They laughed a lot. They'd always been simpatico that way—as friends. The sex had also always been great. It was that in between part—the part she always got wrong. The "in love" part.

 

Raffi put her backpack down and crawled onto the bed until she was sitting next to her, her arm around her. "We gave it a real try this time. I can't tell you what that means to me."

 

"Yes, you can. You get to leave me. Not be left. There's a world of difference."

 

"I'm not going far." She kissed her on the forehead. "You know I'd die for you. I'll definitely kill for you. But we just don't work, not as a couple."

 

She nodded. "I should have let you find that out earlier."

 

"But then I wouldn't be your first officer. And I love being your first officer."

 

"Is there someone else?" God, she hated asking that question. With Chakotay there had never not been someone else, the ghost of Kathryn Janeway, haunting them no matter how far away they got.

 

"No. This is just the right thing to do." She leaned her head against Seven's shoulder.

 

Seven's padd pinged and she picked it up to see a text message from Kathryn. Have engineer for you. Best fit possible.

 

She showed Raffi the text.

 

"Good, because Cable is in over his head."

 

She texted back. Who?

 

I've got an opening at five. Come down and we'll talk and Tom can introduce you to his latest scotch find.

 

She stared at the reply. "Fuck."

 

"What? Drinks. With her. And good scotch. Enjoy it."

 

"No. She won't just tell me now." She met Raffi's eyes. "There's only one person who would piss me off so much she'd need to tell me after a few glasses of scotch."

 

Raffi looked confused.

 

"Shaw, Raffi."

 

"Oh, come on. He's a captain and ready to move onward and upward. He's not being assigned here. She just wants to see you."

 

"Then she'd invite me over to her place like usual. In her office? With Tom and no doubt B'Elanna too? This is about Shaw—I can feel it in my ranger bones."

 

"On the plus side, if it is him, he probably doesn't want to be here any more than you want him here."

 

"Yeah, that's a huge plus. Thanks, Raff."

 

"He's a really good engineer, right?"

 

She nodded.

 

"And won't it be kind of fun to be his boss? You can call him Shawn or Sheen, just like he never used your real name." Raffi was laughing the way Seven loved.

 

"I'm not going to do that. It's a fun idea though." She slid down so she was curled up with her head in Raffi's lap. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck."

 

##

 

"Have another glass, Seven."

 

"Are you under orders to get me drunk, Tom?"

 

"Leave Tom alone, Seven. Oh, B'Elanna, come in and join us."

 

"As if she's just here by accident."

 

"Jesus you drank that fast."

 

"You go be a ranger, Tom. Tell me how much hooch you can hold."

 

"I don't want her so drunk she won't remember the conversation, Mr. Paris."

 

"Leave him alone, Kathryn. I already know what you three want to tell me. It's Shaw, isn't it?"

 

"..."

 

"I was a ranger. I'm not the pathetically literal ex-Borg scientist anymore. I can read between the lines—especially for this. Is it him or isn't it?"

 

"It is. B'Elanna, tell her why."

 

"I don't need to. She already knows her ship needs him."

 

"There are others nearly as skilled."

 

"No, there really aren't, Seven. I know it and you know it. He's told me how you two worked together."

 

"He told you that?"

 

"He did. It might have been the nicest thing he had to say about you, but he was smiling when he said it."

 

"Oh, fuck you all. Get me some bourbon, Tom. If I'm going to have to drink to bringing the bane of my existence onto my ship, it should be with the whiskey I prefer."

 

"Bourbon it is, my lady."

 

"Shove that courtly bullshit up your ass, Tom. Just for this, Kathryn, Raffi gets to come with me to dinner at your place the next time I'm near Earth."

 

"Is that something she wants?"

 

"I don't know. But if it is, you have to invite her."

 

"Fine, your girlfriend is always welcome."

 

"I've never seen anyone throw a glass of bourbon back that fast. Are you two still together?"

 

"Quit being insightful, Mr. Paris."

 

"I'm sorry, Seven. I didn't understand that whole thing but I am sorry."

 

"Me, too."

 

"Me, three. More bourb—sure, you can just drink from the bottle. No problem."

 

2.

 

"So I guess you finally have to meet with me." She had chosen a table near the windows in the Officer's club. Let everyone see how well she and her former Borg-hating captain got on.

 

"I guess so." He sipped a glass of what was no doubt Malbec. "Let's at least be honest. This was nobody's first choice."

 

"Or at least nobody who is currently sitting at this table." She sipped her bourbon—she'd made it a double.

 

"Yes, that." He met her eyes. "I don't want a party."

 

"I don't give a rat's ass what you want. Moreover, you trained me better than that. 'We send a message with everything we do and everything we say, Hansen.'"

 

"Yeah, well we can send the message that we fucking detest each other. I'm fine with that."

 

She leaned back, unwilling to let him goad her the way she had so many times when she was serving under him. She swirled her whiskey, watching the light catch it.

 

"Oooh, someone's learned to hold her tongue."

 

She slowly lifted her eyes, her expression stone. She used to be able to do this on command when she was a ranger. Working with him—why had she been so fucking volatile?

 

Why had she wanted to be? And she still did, even if she wasn't going to give him that.

 

"You will have a party. We will make nice during it and after that, other than ship's business, I will leave you alone in your domain and you can leave me alone in mine."

 

"Sounds hunky dory."

 

She nodded. "I understand I'm not writing your review. That's irregular."

 

"I asked for it to be. Gives me a level of independence I currently crave."

 

"You gave me the ship. Yet you don't trust me to evaluate you fairly?"

 

"No, I gave you Titan. It's not that anymore." His look was hard—but she read heartbreak for the ship he loved, not any anger at her.

 

"I hate that they changed the name."

 

"Way to throw me a bone."

 

"I don't throw bones unless it's the only weapon I have at hand." She studied him. His hair was grayer but he'd bulked up in a good way. Working out no doubt—when he wasn't fucking everything in sight.

 

Not that she cared.

 

"It's the Enterprise now. I can't change that. But I'd have kept it the original name. I said I hate that it was changed and I mean that. You know me well enough. I don't lie all that well when it comes to something like this."

 

He was studying her and she could imagine what he was seeing. She'd taken extra care with her makeup. She wanted it to look like she had nothing on while still looking as good as she possibly could.

 

How many of the women he fucked looked like her?

 

Shit. Why did it goddamn matter?

 

Why did it matter how he'd looked at her when he died? How she hadn't been able to leave him while telling her actual—if sort of ex—lover to leave her alone with him. With her fucking back to active fire.

 

She suddenly felt weird under his scrutiny. "What?"

 

"It suits you. The extra pip."

 

"Being earthbound suited you. I heard you had a great deal of fun." Oh, shit, no. She had not just said that out loud.

 

But he just laughed. "Jesus, you'd think a man never fucked anyone before the way people talk about it."

 

"I assume it's because you were so by the book."

 

"Having some fun with non-Starfleet ladies isn't not by the book. I think it's the epitome of the book." He leaned in. "Unlike say fucking your first officer."

 

"We had a prior relationship."

 

"Yeah, that's not in the book."

 

"It's in my book. The one I'm writing."

 

"Don't use my review against me." But he was obviously fighting back a laugh.

 

She knew she was not biting back the smile that was starting. "I missed the mental stimulation of our...disagreements."

 

"Arguments. Fights, even."

 

She conceded with a nod. "Yes. Not always our finest moment."

 

He swallowed hard. "It was the last thing T'Veen heard us doing."

 

"I know. I... Shame is I think the correct emotion to define how I feel when I think about it. I try not to think about it."

 

"Until you look at the science station. You got her sister in?"

 

She nodded.

 

"I'd have picked her too. I tried to get them both on when I first selected T'Veen but T'Vara decided to go another way. Glad she found her way back."

 

"I am surprised she trusts me."

 

"Who says she does?"

 

She frowned.

 

"I don't mean she doesn't. It's just...we never really know, as captains. We give the order and hope to hell they'll understand why or if not, just go with it. Because they trust us. But sometimes they're just following orders."

 

She nodded slowly. This was the Shaw she enjoyed most. The one who dropped the bullshit and just talked to her, equal to equal, teaching her things without overtly trying.

 

"I've missed our arguments too. For what it's worth." He waved over a server and ordered them a refill. "It's on me. I should have met with you when you asked."

 

"I wanted to apologize. For everything that happened with Picard."

 

"I know."

 

"You said we were good. And then never spoke to me again. The antithesis of good."

 

"The way I see it, things happened the way they needed to. Or we'd be dead or assimilated or something not very pleasant. How it went down was...a suck-fest but it worked out. So we're good."

 

It still felt insufficient.

 

"Take the win, Hansen." He seemed to be waiting for her to correct him.

 

It felt exhausting to have to do it after everything. She started to get up.

 

"Seven, sit. You can't leave when a refill's on its way. It's bad luck."

 

"According to...?"

 

"Me." He finally gave her a tired grin. "Please. I'm sorry. I'm a dick. This is news to neither of us."

 

"You are. But the engines—they need you."

 

"Do you? Need me?"

 

"So I'm told." She gave him a wry smile.

 

"What do you say?"

 

"It will be pleasant to feel safe when I ask for warp."

 

"Cable really that over his head?"

 

"Since H'ala left, yes. Before she retired, he was doing fine."

 

"I'll get him back on track." He smiled at the server then lifted his glass to Seven. "To rehabbing lost souls."

 

"While avoiding the fuck out of each other." She lifted her glass back.

 

"Sounds good." He took a healthy swallow. "Now, tell me what else has changed. I hear Crusher's on the ship? Whose call was that? His daddy's?"

 

"Mine." She met his eyes, did not look away.

 

"Okay then."

 

##

 

It was shift change, and Shaw was getting to know what horror had been visited on his engines when he heard footsteps—multiple feet.

 

He looked up to see La Forge, Esmar, and Mura walk in and all lean back against a bulkhead, arms crossed over their chests.

 

"Hello to you too."

 

"You never come up to the bridge," Esmar said, their eyes stone cold.

 

"It's super obvious you're avoiding it," La Forge said.

 

"Avoiding us." Mura glared.

 

"Wow, did you practice that or what?" He folded his arms over his chest to be one with the group. "What role would I have up there exactly?"

 

"You could say hello to T'Vara."

 

"I said hello to her at my party." The party he'd said he hadn't wanted but had enjoyed the hell out of. He'd missed these people more than he'd thought.

 

He sort of loved that these three were down here telling him off. "I'll be up tomorrow for the staff meeting. I'll make sure to come up in the front lift, how's that?"

 

They didn't seem to soften.

 

"Guys, what do you think I'd accomplish up there? I'm serious. You need me, you know where I am. Or you comm me and I'm there. Or one of my staff is. What is this?"

 

New footsteps entering and he recognized them and closed his eyes and prayed for patience. "Crusher?"

 

"Okay, they are doing the shittiest job ever just like I thought they would. They are actually not here to make you feel bad. They are here to make sure you don't hate them for having turned Borg."

 

"Of course not. Not your fault." He looked at Crusher. "You're annoying as fuck, but it's not your fault either. It was in your goddamned genes."

 

The other three seemed to relax.

 

"You thought I didn't come up because I was mad at you?"

 

They all nodded.

 

"No. Come on. You know me. I say what I think." He walked over and started with Esmar. "Hug or handshake or just a head nod?"

 

"Hug," they said as they grabbed him hard. "I missed you so much."

 

"Same, Kova."

 

He'd barely moved to Sidney before she launched herself at him. "You died."

 

"I did. But only for a while."

 

She laughed and it was kind of a sniffly laugh and he realized she was crying.

 

"No crying in engineering, Sidney."

 

"Sorry." She grinned at him.

 

He moved to Mura. "Matthew? Hug or—"

 

Mura nearly knocked the breath out of him with his hug. "I'm so sorry. I should have been too old."

 

"It's not your fault you're a kid at heart."

 

"But I have a kid. I shouldn't have turned."

 

"It wasn't up to you, clearly. We're fine, Matthew."

 

He heard Crusher coughing theatrically and let go of Mura. "No fucking hug for you."

 

"I'm shocked, Shaw. Truly." He laughed and then held out his hand. "Bygones and all that?"

 

"Yeah, fine." He took Crusher's hand in his, realized the kid had one hell of a grip. "You arm wrestle?"

 

He nodded.

 

"Take you on some night in Ten Forward. Loser pays for the house."

 

"I'm a lowly ensign."

 

"Who's good for it or did I misunderstand the criminal part of your criminal enterprise?"

 

"I don't know that I'd call it an enterprise. More a family business caused by necessity."

 

"Whatever. Are you chickening out or what?"

 

"No, fine, some night, yeah." He seemed to be studying Shaw's arms. "You've beefed up though."

 

"Take it back and look like a schmo in front of Sidney."

 

"He already looks like one to me." She laughed when Crusher glared at her. "I like him despite that."

 

"Can you guys clear out? I was communing with my engines. We're all fine, okay? Or...are you not okay with me?"

 

"No, we're thrilled you're back," Esmar said gently.

 

"If only for the arguments you're sure to have with the captain eventually." Mura winked at him.

 

"Epic stuff from what I've heard," Crusher said with a snicker. "All right, guys. Let me go win our drinks tonight."

 

Everyone looked happy so Shaw said, "By arm wrestling for them?"

 

Sidney shot him a "you're a sucker look."

 

"Haven't lost yet, sir." Crusher gave him the most exaggerated wink and then led them all out.

 

He stood staring at the exit, then went back to getting to know his engines, talking to the beta shift staff as he made his way around the room.

 

There was no fucking way Crusher was going to beat him.

 

Shit, he needed to work on his arm muscles more—which ones were most important for arm wrestling?

 

##

 

"So, Captain, why is there no Malbec in the lounge?"

 

"Astonishingly it wasn't requested once you left. Go to Ten Forward—it has everything. But then you know that."

 

"Let me guess. Bourbon orders went up. Suck up to whoever's in charge."

 

"Bourbon is statistically one of the most popular liquors ordered. I had nothing to do with it."

 

"Someone had to take it off the menu."

 

"Wasn't me. And as I said it's available in Ten Forward. Go there. I'll stay here. Have a nice night, Shaw."

 

"I don't want to go to there. I want to be here."

 

"Then order something else."

 

"I don't want to."

 

"I don't give a rat's ass what you want. It is available, just not here. Use that big brain of yours, Captain, and find it elsewhere."

 

"..."

 

"Nice stare down, Sev. Guess you won since he left? Also, everyone could hear you two."

 

"Only those in the immediate vicinity."

 

"Which is a lot of people because it's packed"

 

"Yes, well, that's business as normal for us, Raff."

 

"Not a great look."

 

"The old crew are seriously used to it. The new ones will get used to it."

 

"Seven, I think you two need to work— Don't shrug and make that face. You let him push your buttons. And you find his and stomp on them—repeatedly."

 

"And you care why?"

 

"Because...you know what? I have no idea why I do if you two don't. This is agita I don't need. You want a refill on that?"

 

"No, I've had enough. Ginger ale?"

 

"Good call. Another drink and you'd be following him to Ten Forward to fight more."

 

"Would not."

 

"I am not going to argue with you. You're ridiculous."

 

"He's a jerk."

 

"You're both jackasses. But whatever. This is me getting us some refills."

 

 

3.

 

He watched Seven come into the lounge and waited until she saw him to raise his glass of Malbec to her.

 

She frowned and walked over.

 

He had the bottle on the table. And an extra glass. "It's on me."

 

"You brought it from your private stash?"

 

"Nope, they stock it here now."

 

Her frown was even deeper. God it felt good to fight with her. Even though this was just the beginning of a fight, but it sent shivers up his neck just thinking about how quick her comebacks would be.

 

His women of the moment had been very accommodating, most of them very smart because he liked verbal foreplay and talking after sex, even if he'd never slept over with any of them. But none of them had her ability to play conversational cutthroat ping-pong. And he'd missed it.

 

"I'm tight with the quartermaster."

 

"He stocked the lounge with that? And I'm still waiting for a desk chair that doesn't hurt my back?"

 

He laughed and nodded. Then frowned. "My chair was really comfortable. Can I have it back when your new one comes?"

 

She looked anywhere but at him.

 

"Oh, my God. What did you do?"

 

"When you wouldn't meet with me I may have..." She took a long breath.

 

"Destroyed it and pretended I was sitting in it when you did?" He was laughing even harder.

 

"Yes. As a matter of fact. And it was really fucking comfortable. If the replicator were big enough to do furniture I'd make a new one just like it, but alas, per regulations, those requests go through the quartermaster."

 

"At least you learned the regs under me."

 

"Fuck you."

 

"There she is."

 

He expected her to keep going but instead she leaned forward and lowered her voice. "Raffi thinks we shouldn't fight so...visibly and loudly and in front of the crew. Or possibly at all. I'm not sure but she was ummm appalled I think is the right word."

 

"But it's our way."

 

"I know."

 

"We've always argued. Always."

 

"I know. But maybe she's right? She understands people better than I do."

 

"I understand people better than you do too. And I say it's fine. It's how we do it."

 

"But you're a self-proclaimed asshole."

 

He couldn't help it; he laughed. "I am. But so are you. Minus the self-proclaimed part."

 

"I've been way less volatile lately."

 

"That's because there was no one to fight with." He grabbed the glass and poured her a decent amount. "Drink and forget about us not fighting. This is who we are."

 

"Fine." She downed half the glass.

 

"Okay so I have something serious to ask. Crew related. Some of the younger crew came to me—about being turned, was I mad at them, that kind of thing."

 

"You were kind?"

 

"Of course I was kind. Jesus, Seven." Wow, it felt really natural calling her that.

 

She looked shocked that he had but stayed quiet. He liked this more measured woman she was becoming, even if he didn't want that all the time. He'd seen this person inside her—it was why he'd unreservedly recommended her for promotion.

 

"Anyway, if whoever shot me is still on the ship, maybe they need to talk to me too? Get closure. Or...forgiveness."

 

Her face went so soft for a moment he felt like he was back on the floor of the maintenance deck, with her hands holding his head, with her eyes tearing up. "They transferred off."

 

"Do you think they need forgiveness?"

 

She nodded without hesitation. "But I'm not giving you the name. They didn't want me to."

 

"If I write something, will you make sure they get it?"

 

"I will."

 

"Okay. I'll do that. Are they prospering—wherever they went?"

 

"I don't think so. I think you writing them would really help."

 

He remembered how he felt after Wolf 359. How many people were watching out for him, watching over him, ensuring he saw the next day even if it meant they were with him all night drinking coffee and playing cards and just getting him through to sunrise. "You're keeping tabs on them, right? People can look like they're doing fine but..."

 

"Yes, Liam, they're under observation. That's all I'm going to say."

 

"Fuck. It's not their fault."

 

"I know that."

 

"Did you just call me Liam?"

 

"It was a mistake. You got protective and it made me momentarily fond of you. It won't happen again."

 

"You can call me Liam. If you want. I mean obviously you can—you're the boss now. The weird part of your name is that since you didn't go by Captain of Nine, there's no way to tell if people are being familiar or not when they call you Seven. I guess Spock went through that too. And Data. And—"

 

"Yes, Shaw, I get the picture."

 

He laughed. "Look at us not arguing loudly in front of impressionable crew. Where is Raffi to witness this breakthrough?"

 

She smiled and sipped her wine.

 

"You guys are done, I guess?"

 

"Yeah. Why?"

 

"Just getting an idea of the landscape. I left and some things changed." He leaned in and met her eyes. "It's not like I care who you are or aren't fucking."

 

She did not look away. "Not like I care who you are either."

 

"Well, good. Glad we got that settled."

 

"Me, too." She looked at her wine glass, making the liquid swirl the same way she always did with her drinks. He liked how that hadn't changed. "How are you finding Cable?"

 

"He is overwhelmed. But he'll be okay. He's just not ready to lead yet. But I'll get him there."

 

"Okay." She finished her wine and stood. "I'm sorry. I'm just so beat."

 

"It's no problem. Thanks for the talk and I'll get that note written."

 

She smiled—her look so soft again. "Goodnight then."

 

"Goodnight."

 

##

 

She stomped into engineering, trying like hell not to start crying before she got to his office.

 

He was working on something with Cable but stopped the moment he saw her expression and met her at the door to his office, closing the door and engaging the privacy screens. "I saw the report."

 

She swallowed hard, trying to push back the tears.

 

"Did you come here for a hug?"

 

"Fuck you. I'd have gone to Raffi if I'd wanted that. I want you to tell me what I did wrong. I thought everything was fine. And Samar died anyway. What was my mistake? What regulation didn't I follow?"

 

She dashed the tears that were leaking out.

 

He sat down. "You want me to tell you what you did wrong?"

 

She nodded. "Be brutally honest."

 

"I read the report. I wasn't there."

 

"You read between the lines better than anyone I know. What did I do wrong?"

 

"Nothing."

 

"Nothing? I can't fix nothing."

 

"I know." He sighed. "Sit down. I'm getting a crick in my neck." When she didn't, he said, "Please, Seven?"

 

She finally sat and just stared at him. "Are you going easy on me? First time and all. Pity the poor incompetent captain?"

 

"Jesus Fucking Christ, Hansen. No. Sometimes you do nothing wrong and someone dies. It goddamn sucks. It does. And I can't make it better for you. I also can't tear you apart so you feel suitably hurt for walking away from the mission in one piece when Samar didn't." He sighed in what seemed like frustration. "And I'm sorry I called you Hansen. It won't happen again."

 

"You were being my captain. My captain called me Hansen. It's okay. I need that captain right now."

 

"I wish I could tell you Samar was reckless and pushed things, and this was bound to happen, but she wasn't. I wish I could tell you that you have a blind spot, and that was it, and now you can fix it, but you don't. I've been with you on missions, and you look out for everyone. Always. But you can't protect everyone all the time. Death fucking sucks but it happens."

 

She closed her eyes. "She was there, and then they fired, and she looked at me. I saw the light go out."

 

"Just like you did with me? I was your first death, Seven. Not Samar."

 

"So now I have two. Way to make me feel better, dipshit."

 

"Well, mine didn't stick. So..."

 

"You're still not making it better." Only he was; she felt steadier already. "I've never made the call. To parents or partners or children. How do you do it?"

 

"I guess on Voyager Janeway never had to do that."

 

"There was no one to tell." She sighed. "It ate her up sometimes. The weight of all those deaths."

 

"Well, it's not going to be you alone. You call the bereavement office. They're so good. They do this all the time. You be sure to tell them it's your first casualty. They understand what that means to a captain. Okay?"

 

She nodded. "You're being really nice."

 

His smile was very gentle. "You came to me for punishment. This is just me being the unpredictable dick."

 

"I didn't come to you for punishment. I came to you for clarity." She met his eyes. "You've taught me a lot. I know you think I took none of those lessons to heart, but I did."

 

"My legacy?"

 

"We all are. All of us who served under you." She stood. "I'm going to go get that hug now from Raffi. And then I'm going to call the bereavement office."

 

"Okay."

 

She just stood there, willing her legs to move.

 

"Oh, fuck it," he said and got up and walked around and pulled her into a hug. "It's okay."

 

"Not for Samar."

 

"No, not for Samar."

 

She let him go. "Thank you."

 

He nodded. "You got your hug. Now go do your job and call the bereavement office."

 

"Yes, sir."

 

##

 

"Everything okay?"

 

"Yes. Thank you. They were super helpful. The call was excruciating though."

 

"It always is."

 

"And wonder of wonders the quartermaster got my chair done."

 

"Wow. And we were just talking about that."

 

"He never liked me."

 

"He's over that now. We had a talk."

 

"Oh really? Back to being captain, are we?"

 

"Nope, just making sure old ties don't get in the way of efficiency on your ship."

 

"Thank you."

 

"Thank you for sending me the reply to my note. There were questions. I'm going to answer them—you'll send them on?"

 

"I will."

 

"Tell me who it is?"

 

"I promised."

 

"Okay but it would just be easier if—"

 

"I fucking promised."

 

"Got it. Sorry."

 

"No, I get it. I get why you want to know. But I can't."

 

"Okay."

 

"Wow, who knew talking at such a low volume was in either of your skill sets?"

 

"Hey, Raffi. Yeah, we're working on that."

 

"No, we're not. He's just saying that to make you think we are."

 

"Okay that's probably true. But you didn't need to tell her. She doesn't know me that well yet. We could have totally fooled her."

 

"I'm not an idiot, Shaw."

 

"Of that I'm well aware. This one wouldn't put up with you as her first officer if you were."

 

"Are you trying to charm me?"

 

"Oh, I have no charm. You try that setting and you'll just get asshole."

 

"Good talk."

 

"I scared her off."

 

"Yeah but she's happy with us. Not arguing."

 

"Tomorrow's another day. I'm sure we can find something to fight about."

 

 

4.

 

She was with Shaw in engineering. Jack was there too, working with Cable. Shaw had called in Gamma shift too just for the extra hands. Some kind of pulse from the anomaly they'd been studying had knocked out the engines and it was all hands on deck to get things back up and running.

 

"Captain, we've got a problem," sounded in the earbud she was wearing. She'd given Shaw the other one since he was working with the bridge crew to check on panel statuses.

 

"What is it?" they answered as one and then he laughed and said, "Sorry. Old habits die hard."

 

"What is it, Raff?"

 

"A ship, shields up, weapons targeted. They're hailing. How much time do you need?"

 

She looked at Shaw and he answered, "We're almost done. Five minutes?"

 

She rolled her eyes because that was pushing it but trust him to not emulate Scotty in the exaggerate the time aspect. "Stall them, Raff."

 

"How...?"

 

"Be James T. Kirk," Shaw said.

 

"What the hell does that mean?"

 

"Improv," she and he said together. "You're Captain Musiker." Both she and Shaw adjusted their earbuds so they wouldn't interfere with Raffi's concentration.

 

"Hurry," Raffi said before telling Esmar, "Open a channel," as they worked at a much more frantic pace.

 

Then she said, "Hi, boys," in the most seductive voice imaginable, and both Seven and Shaw started to laugh. "This is Captain Musiker of the USS Enterprise."

 

"She went for that aspect of Kirk?"

 

"She'll go with whatever works." But Seven started laughing when whoever was on the other end said, "Oh, hi," in a slightly shell shocked way. She'd felt the same way when she first laid eyes on Raffi.

 

"Funny way of saying hello, boys. Shields up and weapons targeted. I'm hurt."

 

"Jesus, she's good." He gently installed the chip and yelled over to Cable, "You got yours settled?"

 

"Yep."

 

She looked at Jack and he made a face and shrugged. Shaw obviously saw it too and said softly, "If I go check his work, I'll ruin the progress we've made. But if you do..."

 

"On it." She ran over and said, "Just want to make sure yours looks like ours. What a mess these are." She did a quick check, saw it was fine, and said, "Thanks, guys," and ran back.

 

"It's fine."

 

"Nicely done."

 

"Yeah, well, you should see me without my implants."

 

"Well, nobody has so..."

 

"Actually..." She sighed. "Nope. Too long a story for now."

 

"Is it too long a story for later?" He didn't look at her as he asked.

 

"I'm not sure."

 

"Fair." He traded tools with her. "Raffi's just being super quiet? Is that a tactic?"

 

"Oh, God, yeah. The Raffi stare of silence. It's terrifying if you're at the receiving end."

 

"Good to know. Hold here." He worked around her hands, just like they used to, an intricate dance they did better than she thought they ever would on an actual dance floor.

 

"So," whoever was on the other ship said, "we've never heard of a Captain Musiker. Prepare to be boarded."

 

"What? They've got the Starfleet directory at their disposal?" Shaw shook his head.

 

Raffi didn't miss a beat. "I know. That's because I was taken off my old ship because I have this nasty habit of shooting first and asking questions later. I'm trying to reform my reputation. Take a beat. Not blow you out of the sky for pissing me off. You know? People can grow, right?"

 

They both laughed as they worked.

 

"We're the ones with the weapons targeted. And shields—which you do not appear to have."

 

"Oh, I have them. But does a person bring out a thermal cannon to swat a fly? No. Your cute little ship with its darling little shields might as well be made of tissue paper." She sounded like she was on the move, approaching the screen. "Did you know that the Klingons have three hundred and forty seven ways to remove a limb without anesthesia and not have the victim bleed out? I have a very good friend who's taught me eighteen of them." Her voice was so fucking sexy as she threatened them.

 

"Jesus, she's terrifying." He put the last chip in and yelled, "Everyone good?"

 

Teams started yelling back, all good.

 

"All right. All clear while I power this up."

 

She waited, tensed for something to go wrong, and the engines sort of hiccuped. Then they came to glorious life.

 

"Your ship is ready, Captain Seven."

 

"You're my hero, Captain Shaw." She was already programming the commands to raise shields, to target weapons. She knew Mura would understand what he was seeing happening on his panel. Wouldn't panic.

 

Raffi was still going, but her tone had changed—she knew the ship had the power she needed. "Since I'm not supposed to hack up prisoners anymore, it's not really fun to take prisoners. So, maybe I will use the cannon to swat the fly. I'm thinking it might be interesting to try to slice your ship in two. But diagonally, like a fancy sandwich. You still think you can board my ship, boys?"

 

"It's like the best radio show ever." Shaw grinned at her and she nodded back.

 

"Ship has retreated. Do we pursue?" La Forge asked.

 

"No," both Seven and Shaw said but they weren't on speaker to Raffi.

 

"No, the Enterprise looks dangerous now. Let's not move and find out she's not."

 

"God damn I love her, Seven."

 

"I know. She's awesome." Then she looked over at him. "You don't really, right?"

 

He laughed. "Figure of speech." He went back to the panel, closing things up. "Would you care?" he asked softly.

 

"Of course not. Free planet."

 

"Ship. It's a free ship."

 

"Fuck you, Liam."

 

"Yeah, fuck you too, Seven." He gave her his loopiest grin and she hated how much it made her melt. "Like old times working together."

 

"Yeah. Yeah, it was."

 

##

 

Shaw looked down at the bottle of bourbon he'd ordered and took a deep breath then headed off to his old quarters. He rang the chime, fighting the urge to see if he was still on the door.

 

Seven opened it. She was in shorts and a cut-up sweatshirt and her hair was wet, her skin free of makeup and holy shit she looked good.

 

He forced himself to stop staring. Told himself to not worry that he'd spent way too long picking which casual clothes would be the right ones for this delivery. "So, when I made the review, I ordered this and had it delivered to my parents' house. If Starfleet listened to me, it was going to be my congratulations present on your promotion. If not, I would have found some other excuse. But they did, so..." He handed her the bottle. "Congratulations."

 

She looked at the label and her face was shocked. "This is Pappy."

 

"Yeah, I know."

 

"Pappy Van Winkle. Fifteen year."

 

"Yeah, I know, Seven. I bought the fucking stuff."

 

"Have you had it?"

 

"No. Have you?"

 

"No. This is so expensive. And hard to find."

 

"It is. But how often do you make captain? Or you were going to be rid of me and my calling you Hansen and being a general bug up your ass so it seemed like you deserved it even if you didn't make captain."

 

She seemed truly delighted with the gift.

 

He knew he was smiling way too big. "I'd tell you to share it with Raffi but I've noticed she sticks to soft drinks or water."

 

She nodded quickly but didn't give him any more information on that.

 

"You're so loyal. It's what I liked best about you. Other than arguing with you."

 

She moved out of the way and said, "Come in. Drink this with me."

 

"Yeah?"

 

She nodded. "Because, I wasn't loyal. Not to you. Not when it counted."

 

He followed her in. She hadn't done much to change the quarters. "I like how you made it your own. Jesus, would art on the wall kill you?" He'd asked for his own back so every wall was blank.

 

"I guess I should do that. I've never been a big collector of things. Drones travel light, obviously. Don't think I ever lost that."

 

He walked to her closet. "Can I test that theory?"

 

She nodded and he opened the door. It was neater than his closet was. And not full of clothes. Not empty either. Just enough, he thought.

 

He closed the door and turned back to her. "You were loyal. Just not to me."

 

She looked down.

 

"No, that's more an observation than a criticism at this point. People act like loyalty's an absolute but it's not. It's relative. Your loyalty to Picard trumped any you had for me. And I bet your loyalty to Janeway would trump what you have for Picard."

 

She seemed to think about that, then nodded.

 

"I lost sight of that. I just was so mad. So..." Did he want to give her this part? Yeah, yeah he did. "Hurt."

 

"I know." She turned away, getting glasses, letting him so very gracefully off the emotional hook. "Ice?"

 

"No."

 

She poured and handed him his, then smelled the small fortune residing in her glass. "Yum."

 

He didn't move, just watched her as she took the first sip, as she closed her eyes and smiled and said, "Fifteen years shut up in a cask is good for the soul."

 

"If you're liquor. For humans, not so much."

 

She laughed. "Right."

 

"Some people think it ages in the bottle too. That it's fifteen plus however many years."

 

"I'm not one of those people."

 

"Didn't say you were."

 

She laughed and rolled her eyes at him. "I don't want to argue over Pappy. Drink. Come on."

 

He took a sip, knowing it wouldn't live up to the hype because so little did. But... "Holy shit, this is good."

 

"Yeah." Her smile was luminous. "It really is." She sat down and studied him. "Is it weird being in here again? Not having it be yours?"

 

He chose the chair across from her. "Yeah, a little, I guess. But no. Because I'm actually really fucking happy in engineering."

 

"I thought you were. You smile a lot."

 

"Yeah, I didn't do a lot of that on Earth, looking back. I was just sort of...peacefully there but not stimulated."

 

"So how did you become such a chick magnet?"

 

"Not gonna let that go, are you?"

 

"I never saw you hit on anyone during the time we served. Peers from other ships. Civilians on shore leave. No one—well, I guess you could have on home leave."

 

"Were you watching for that?" He grinned to let her know any answer was okay.

 

"Maybe? I guess I wanted to know what a captain does when they're lonely. Janeway retreated to her room and wouldn't talk to anyone until she was out of her funk. Picard pretended he didn't need anyone. You just seemed copacetic being a monk."

 

He laughed out loud. "A monk? You were a fucking nun."

 

"So you were watching me?"

 

"Making sure you didn't make a misstep that would have tarnished such a new record. Voyager had to be a weird place to learn protocol. You were all alone out there. Relationships had to endure or end amicably. No one to gossip to outside the ship. I mean you were dating the first officer and nobody said a word, right?" When she nodded, he went on. "Which you did again with Raffi. So I guess I don't know why I even questioned it." He laughed and drank more of the very excellent whiskey.

 

"I'm glad we both had such professional reasons for caring whether or not the other was sexually active."

 

"Yeah. Pretty great of us." He wasn't laughing anymore. She wasn't either. And was it suddenly super hot in here?

 

He downed the rest of his drink in one swallow. "I'm going to let you enjoy that in peace."

 

"Thank you for this. It means the world."

 

"We were bosses today in engineering."

 

"Yes, we were."

 

He got all the way to the door before the words he was desperately trying to hold back came out. "I've really missed you."

 

"Me too."

 

He turned to look at her. "We should go back to fighting. Or it'll confuse everyone."

 

"Including us."

 

"Yeah. Especially us."

 

"I'll fight with you tomorrow. Tonight I'm just going to enjoy this." She patted the bottle lovingly. "Goodnight, Liam."

 

"Goodnight, Seven."

 

##

 

"Uh, what are they doing, Sev?"

 

"Who?"

 

"Shaw and Crusher."

 

"Oh, arm wrestling. Whoever loses buys Ten Forward a drink."

 

"Shaw's going to break off that fool's arm."

 

"Raffi, no. Jack's going to own him."

 

"Have you looked at Shaw's arms?"

 

"Well, you apparently have."

 

"Oh, come on. Those are good arms. Oh. Huh. Not what I expected."

 

"What's happening? I don't want to turn around and appear to be condoning this idiocy."

 

"Boys really are dumb."

 

"God. So dumb."

 

"They're not even moving. Crusher's face is so red I'm afraid he's going to have an aneurism or something and we'll have to explain to his mother what we let happen."

 

"Okay that's terrifying. And Shaw?"

 

"I didn't know there were that many veins on a human face. Do they pop at some point? Is this going to be bloody?"

 

"Oh for fuck's sake. Wow, you were not kidding on the redness. And no, there aren't normally that many veins."

 

"One of us has to do something."

 

"I'll do it. Perk of the big title."

 

"Yeah, right."

 

"Okay, children. I declare this a draw and everyone will just have to pay their own bar tab tonight."

 

"Sev—Captain. I had him right where I wanted him."

 

"Your face is purple, Jack. And you. This vein is about to explode."

 

"Quit pushing it then. And I don't even have a vein there."

 

"Yes. Yes, you do. Okay, everyone, listen up. No more arm wrestling in Ten Forward. It's my first directive that no one may like but there it is. You want to arm wrestle, go to the gym."

 

"There is a long storied history of these bouts of strength and leverage happening in bars."

 

"Jack, shut it."

 

"He's not wrong."

 

"Shaw, you're not helping."

 

"I'm not trying to. I had him right where I wanted him."

 

"Go. To. The. Gym."

 

"No."

 

"Yeah, what he said. Liam and I stick together."

 

"Crusher, we are not on the same team. We are on opposite teams. That's why this is happening. And I will beat you."

 

"In. The. Fucking. Gym."

 

"Fine, party pooper captain."

 

"Go with him. Or did you also have something brilliantly lame to say to me, Captain Shaw?"

 

"No, what he said pretty much covered it."

 

"Gym."

 

"Going now."

 

"I'm not sure moving venues was the way to go, Sev."

 

"They're wrestling, even if it's just arms. Wrestling is a sport thing. Sport things happen in the gym."

 

"You seem weird."

 

"If bad things happens to people working out or doing sport things in the gym, I'm off the hook. It's this weird regulation I found. Shaw has to know it."

 

"You're reading regulations now? Who are you?"

 

"I know. I ask myself that each time I open the rules and regs file."

 

"Glad I'm not the captain."

 

"It was kind of fun. My first directive. I may have to do more. The power rush...I get the Queen now."

 

"Riiii-ght. Let's pretend you did not just say that."

 

 

 

 

5.

 

Shaw found Seven in the mess the next morning. "This seat taken?" He slid into the booth before she could answer.

 

"Yes, actually."

 

"By your imaginary friend?" Fuck, was she really meeting someone? He studied her and decided she wasn't. "You can't kick people out of a holodeck, Captain Seven. What they do in one, so long as it doesn't violate holodeck privacy protocols and the safeties, is their business."

 

She slowly ate her eggs, looking at him like he was a particularly weird science project.

 

"You have no smart-ass retort?"

 

She sipped her coffee and then said, "No, I do. But I'm savoring this moment. So fucking sweet." She went back to her eggs.

 

He decided to plow into his oatmeal if she was going to play it that way. Let her taste silence too.

 

Only she was smiling like he'd really fucked up and she didn't usually do that unless he had.

 

She finished and held her coffee to her lips but didn't drink, just stared at him over the mug, her eyes dancing.

 

"What?"

 

"It's just, back when I first started with you, in the fantasies I used to play out to help me sleep at night, finding a reg that you didn't know was so high on the list. So high."

 

"That was a fantasy?"

 

"I didn't say it was an erotic one. More payback."

 

"Oh, the not so fun kind of fantasy."

 

"Stay on topic, Shaw." She put her mug down. "Regulation on Holodeck Liabilities and Conduct, Subhead: Enduring Open-Access Holoprograms."

 

Fuck him. That sounded official enough. "What number?"

 

"Five hundred fifty seven point two two five part f. 'If a holodeck program is allowed to run for more than twenty-four hours, is not being used for designated training, and is open to all, the holodeck is treated like any other official area of the ship or installation.'"

 

"Fuck me." He hung his head in mock shame. "Captains are liable."

 

"Yep. Or the ranking officer in the room. So you might be in this case. You've been a captain longer."

 

"Your position is higher."

 

"But it's your program. I looked it up. Riker didn't put it on repeat: you did."

 

"Damnnnnnn. Really fucking satisfying."

 

"So, so satisfying."

 

"And the gym is exempt. Physical activities are by their nature prone to accidents." He admired her game play.

 

"And you were wrestling. It's on the list."

 

"We were arm wrestling."

 

"A feat of strength and leverage, right? Not unlike judo or what else...? Oh, right, like I said: regular wrestling." She smiled with a smug closed-mouth smile. It was really fucking annoying. "Just protecting myself, Captain Shaw."

 

He pulled out his padd just to make sure. She was ballsy enough to bluff.

 

Fuck—there it was. "I bow—in this instance only—to the greater recall of regulations."

 

She laughed and it was the cackle that had so taken him by surprise when he first heard it. Several people in the mess turned around to see who'd brought a goose to breakfast—must be newbies.

 

Then she grabbed his mug and her own and stood.

 

"I add—"

 

"I know what you add to your coffee." She rolled her eyes and sauntered off like she owned the place, which she kind of did.

 

He went back to his oatmeal, shaking his head. The Seven he'd first met would never have beaten him on a regulation issue. Was she actually reading the regs database for fun?

 

He felt so proud.

 

She gently set his mug in front of him and put a plate of danish between them.

 

"Those weren't there before."

 

"They still aren't there. You have a special relationship with the quartermaster and I have one with the cook."

 

"Oh, just because you let him fly the fucking ship? I could have done that."

 

She laughed and said, "Shut up. They're made fresh."

 

"Fine, rub it in." But he took one and holy shit: heaven.

 

"See? You lose at regs, you lose at breakfast sweets."

 

"You forgot one: I have the most annoying dining companion."

 

"I thought you missed me."

 

"That was the whiskey talking."

 

"You can hold your alcohol nearly as well as I can."

 

Sadly this was true. Made it hard to blame his lack of tact on that. Pain meds on the other hand—especially when prescribed by Jack's mommy... "So...you missed me too?"

 

"Did I say that? I was overcome by your generosity. Threw you a bone."

 

"You said that's not your style."

 

"I did say that, didn't I?" She was not looking away, and he wasn't either, and he realized it was again getting really fucking hot where they were sitting.

 

"What are we doing, Seven?"

 

"We're arguing, Liam."

 

"It doesn't feel like it."

 

"Then enjoy it."

 

He frowned and looked away, and he could practically feel her crumple.

 

"Oh, shit. I am so sorry, Shaw. If I've made you uncomfortable, I—"

 

"Hey, no, it's okay. And you didn't. Well, maybe a little. But..." He took a deep breath, thought about whether saying what he wanted to say was a good idea. Oh, fuck it. "But I don't mind the discomfort in this case."

 

She swallowed hard.

 

"One of my favorite fantasies was you reading the regs to me."

 

"Was I clothed?"

 

"I'm going to get in trouble if I answer that. This wasn't a payback type of thing."

 

She laughed, the cackle again, and he laughed too and he knew people were staring at them, but he didn't care. "Dangerous ground, Shaw," she murmured.

 

"Yeah. I'm going to blame it on being so ashamed that you bested me in rule knowledge." He focused on his danish instead of her. "So, we have Starbase Twenty in a few days. Fun place."

 

Her whole demeanor changed. "Unfortunately, I have meetings."

 

"Now you know how I used to feel when the party was going on and I was in a conference room."

 

"No. because I was on the bridge. I usually stayed so others could go have fun."

 

"You can't do that as captain."

 

"Yes, I can."

 

He took a steadying breath the way he used to have to when she was in mule mode. "I always showed up once I was done with the meetings."

 

Her look changed to the slightly pissed off one he was just as familiar with as the stubborn one. "I'm not you."

 

"They need to see you."

 

"They see me here." Her tone had changed. The intimacy was gone.

 

"Am I missing something?"

 

"I'm not good at parties. You know this."

 

He did know it. Unless the party was on the ship with people she knew. But there was something else in her expression, something that had probably always been there but he'd missed it. "What are you leaving out?"

 

"I know what it's like to enter a room without any trace of Borg to color the reaction. To walk up to a group of complete strangers and have them not just tolerate but actually welcome me."

 

"I'm missing so much context for this. You were a kid when you were assimilated so how...?"

 

"It's still too long a story. It's what preceded the Stargazer bullshit, as you used to call it." She was tearing the danish apart rather than eating it. "I wasn't good at socializing before then. I'm certainly not now. When every stare and glare and muttered comment reminds me of how amazing it felt to be simply human." She finally met his eyes. "So, you can hold down the fort when it comes to partying with the crew off ship. Raffi's actually good at it too. As is Ohk. So we're covered."

 

"This question may sound like I'm trying to get us back to where we were before I brought up the starbase, but did you feel beautiful without implants?"

 

"I was beautiful without them." She wasn't meeting his eyes, and had gone back to her willful destruction of breakfast pastry.

 

"What about with them?"

 

"It's different. You wouldn't believe the things people say— My favorite is how pretty I am despite them." She pushed the plate away. "Is now when you throw me the bone? Tell me I'm gorgeous. That you don't even notice them?"

 

"I always notice them."

 

"You always notice everything. So that was a stupid question." She seemed like she was about to get up.

 

"Hey, did I do something to make you uncomfortable? The mood changed super fast."

 

"No. I'm sorry. This base was the closest to where my territory was as a ranger. I hated coming here. They hated me coming here. It was a mutual hate me coming here society."

 

"Well, you're not Ranger Seven of Nine anymore. You're Captain Seven of Nine. And you get the name and serial number of anyone who gives you shit."

 

"And do what with it?"

 

"Give it to Raffi. I'd say give it to me but I really think she's scarier."

 

Finally a smile again. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so...weird."

 

"Hey, you sometimes had to put up with me at my weirdest. I'm just returning the favor."

 

"Thank you. I'm going to let you finish in peace." She stood and rested her hand on his shoulder as she passed.

 

He frowned, but he understood. She really wasn't socially adept when it was a social event in a public place. If she wasn't watching her back in some kind of holdover from her ranger days, she was acting more awkward than she actually should have been.

 

Add in bad memories from this starbase, then add in that they'd let things get really sexy there for a moment and yeah, too much.

 

It had been fun though before he mentioned the starbase. Almost made up for her getting one over on him with the regs.

 

##

 

Seven walked into the Starbase Twenty bar that Jack had told her the crew would be at, feeling the eyes of the manager on her. Yep, same one who hated her when she was a ranger. He probably owned the place.

 

She stared him down, silently daring him to try to kick her out now that she was not only Starfleet but a captain, but he just pointed to the back of the bar where the dance floor was with a resigned look.

 

Wow. That felt good.

 

Until she got to where Raffi was leaning against the wall people-watching and saw Shaw dancing with someone. Someone really fucking pretty.

 

Raffi studied her. "Hey, you. Long meetings?"

 

She nodded. The music ended. She saw another woman claim him. Just as pretty.

 

Raffi seemed to follow her gaze. "For what it's worth, they're asking him."

 

"I don't care."

 

"Uh huh. You've been in a weird mood all week."

 

"No, I haven't."

 

Raffi laughed. "As your friend, I am no longer obligated to follow you where that kind of response generally led when we were together. Being exes is nice."

 

"Yes, being exes with me is always fucking nice." Shit she needed a drink.

 

And she was in uniform and no one else from her crew was. They looked so nice in going-out clothes. Did she even have any?

 

"You look like someone died, Seven." Raffi turned her and walked her to the bar. "Order."

 

"That bourbon," she pointed to one on a high shelf. If she was going to feel like shit, she was going to drink good whiskey doing it. "A double. Rocks."

 

The very pretty woman tending bar nodded but then gave Raffi a huge smile. "Do you want a refill on the cola? My treat?"

 

"Sure," Raffi said with a brilliant smile.

 

Seven felt invisible. She rolled her eyes and turned so she could see where Shaw was.

 

The music must have changed without her noticing because he was nowhere to be seen. His dance partner must have been on his "safe to fuck" list.

 

"Your whiskey, Captain." The woman barely looked at her as she pushed it to her and handed over the retina scanner.

 

She scanned in, then gave it back and turned to leave her and Raffi to ogle each other in peace. But as she looked up, she realized Shaw was standing in front of her, sipping a glass of red wine.

 

"Hi, Seven."

 

"Hi, Liam."

 

"You look pissed."

 

"I shouldn't have come."

 

"I'm glad you did." He took her arm and urged her to the stairs that led to the upper level. "We can watch the kids play from up here."

 

"Oh, but there's so many more pretty women to dance with. Whatever will they do without your company?"

 

He laughed. "Fuck, you're cranky." He walked to the railing that doubled as a bar for drinks.

 

A slight sparkle showed the force field that would keep anything on the bar from falling over onto the people below, and she trailed her finger along it, smiling as it made pretty lights. "I used to do this as a kid."

 

"Me too. I was fascinated by the concept."

 

"Yeah." She grinned. "And it's beautiful. Like the women you're not with. How sad they must be."

 

"I was dancing because I was bored without someone to fight with. But now I've got you so my night is complete."

 

"Don't fight with me tonight."

 

"Well, I haven't really so far so..." He sipped his wine. "Drink. You need to relax just a little, okay?"

 

She did as he said and felt the warm glow of the whiskey. It was good stuff. Scanning the crowd, she saw T'Vara laughing. "So hard to get used to that."

 

He followed her gaze. "I know. They were twins but they diverged in how they embraced their heritages."

 

"Deltans always seem so free."

 

"She's still got enough Vulcan to cause dissonance." He sighed. "I actually think T'Veen might have had it easier. She knew who she was. T'Vara doesn't always want to visit family if we ever stop at Vulcan."

 

"Good to know." She looked over at him. "Thank you."

 

"For the captain-to-captain knowledge transfer?"

 

"For finding me." She sighed, way too dramatically and whispered, "Do you remember when I told you about Icheb. The woman who..."

 

He nodded.

 

"I met her here the last time I saw her. I came back after his death—damn near tore the place up, questioning anyone who looked like they might know her." She closed her eyes. Trying to forget base security showing up, the manager out front having called them, leaving before they could escort her out. Knowing she was being watched all the way to her ship.

 

"Why didn't you just say that the other day?"

 

"Because me right after his death is a period I've tried to bury."

 

"I actually get that. There's a couple years after Wolf 359 that I don't like to think about."

 

She lifted her drink and realized her hand was shaking. "God damn it."

 

"Come on." He put his arm around her and led her to a secluded part of the upstairs, pulling her into a round booth then letting go of her but before he could slide away, she touched his arm and said, "Don't pull away. Please?"

 

"I can't even tell you what hearing you say that, like that, does to me. But you're hurting and you're really off balance, and if anything were to happen, we'd never know. Was it us or just a really shitty night for you when anything would do?"

 

"You're not anything."

 

"All those women you seem to like to talk about? They were. They were anything."

 

"Anything..."

 

"There's you, Seven. And then there's anything else." He swallowed visibly.

 

"But you wouldn't meet me when I asked."

 

"Because there's you and every other fucking person. And as long as I kept you in a little box, way out of reach, then I never had to find out that the only woman I've loved in, well, a lot of fucking years didn't feel the same for me."

 

"You fucked them all because you wanted me?"

 

"You make that sound really noble."

 

She laughed. "You know what I mean."

 

"Yeah, I fucked them all because I wanted you."

 

"But you don't want me tonight?"

 

He brushed her hair back and let his finger linger on the tip of her eyebrow implant. "There's not a fucking night that I don't want you. I just think you're a little too vulnerable tonight. I want to be sure that you're really with me." His half smile was gorgeous and sheepish. "But I'll happily stay in this booth all night with you, talking shop. Or about Icheb. Or whatever you want. Maybe you could tell me the long version of the pre-Stargazer thing?"

 

She smiled gently. "I could do that."

 

"I'm going to move away a little bit. It's not a rejection."

 

She nodded, kept her smile gentle, but didn't look away and he wasn't looking away either.

 

And it felt so damn good.

 

"So where does this adventure start?" His smile was so tender that she reached out and traced his lips. "You can't do that. Not tonight. I want to be the guy with resolve but if you touch me..."

 

"Okay." She moved away a little bit. "That wasn't rejection either. Just...prudence." She took a sip of her drink then said, "It started and ended on the Stargazer."

 

"Oooh, double the bullshit. Okay, once upon a time there was a gorgeous woman named Seven of Nine and she was on the Stargazer...why?"

 

"I thought I was telling the story?"

 

"You are."

 

"Then why are you starting it?"

 

"You know... In case you need help getting going."

 

"I'm perfectly capable of starting my own story."

 

He started to laugh. "I love this part—the arguing—more than anything." Then his smile got very mischievous. "So far anyway..."

 

"Can I tell my goddamn story or do you want to sit here making inferences to the sex you won't let us have tonight?"

 

"That's actually a tough choice." He laughed at her expression. "Fine, scratch the 'once upon a time' shit. Tell it your way, my captain."

 

"Once upon a time..."

 

"See, I knew it started that way."

 

She rolled her eyes, then launched into it.

 

##

 

"This seat taken, Sev?"

 

"Raff, my table is your table. Big breakfast. Someone worked up an appetite."

 

"Uh, and where'd you disappear to last night?"

 

"The upper level. Where'd you disappear to last night? I came down from upstairs and you—and the lovely bartender—were gone."

 

"She needed help in the stockroom."

 

"You fucked her in the stockroom? Raffaela Musiker."

 

"She was working a double. It was that or nothing. She gave me her number after."

 

"Of course she did. Only an idiot wouldn't."

 

"I saw Shaw take you up there. Did you...?"

 

"I told him about our adventures in the alternate timeline and the past."

 

"Oh. Wow."

 

"Me. Without the implants. I realized as I was telling it that I wasn't great to you."

 

"You were enjoying being free."

 

"Yeah, but I wasn't great to you. And I'm sorry."

 

"Thanks. I really like being friends with you."

 

"It's working. I wasn't sure. Our other off periods were 'off again but for who knows how long' periods and this is really over and..."

 

"I know. So...I didn't see Shaw on the dance floor again last night. He was up with you the whole time? Hearing tales of our derring-do and wacky adventures?"

 

"Yeah. And he told me some stuff and I told him other stuff. You know, talking. It was really nice."

 

"You're blushing."

 

"Am not."

 

"Again, not going to argue with you. You have him for that."

 

"Yeah. I think I actually do."

 

"Well, duh. Do you two have any idea how close you stand?"

 

"No. Really? Is that something else we have to work on?"

 

"No. Unlike the overly intense pleasure you two take in arguing, it's really sweet. I'm happy for you."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Yeah. He's growing on me."

 

"I know. He does that."

 

"Like mold. Sorry, didn't mean to make you snort coffee."

 

 

 

 

 

6.

 

Seven had given Raffi the conn and was working in her ready room when the back chime sounded. "Come."

 

It was Liam. He had the sweetest, shyest smile she'd ever seen on him.

 

She loved it.

 

"Hi," she said softly.

 

"I didn't rush right up because in case last night was just a bad night for you, and we said some things, and it was fun then, but you've thought about it and—"

 

She stood and he shut up. She walked over to him, staring deep into his eyes, a smile she knew was way more playful than her norm on her lips, and he swallowed visibly. "Let's try that again, Captain Shaw. Hi."

 

"Hi." His smile grew bigger. "So you're not rethinking things."

 

"Are you? You told me you were in love with me."

 

"I am. No rethinking necessary."

 

"Well, same here." She moved closer but he put his hand up. "Are you against kissing?"

 

"I'm so not." He laughed. "Okay, hear me out for a second. I really, really would like to just pull you into my arms and kiss you like I really hope you've never been kissed. And then put you up against the wall like I wanted to so many times but..." He took a breath and exhaled slowly. "We've got time. And there's all these things that will be our first time doing them. And what if we took it slow and relished those?"

 

She knew her smile was beyond sappy. "Really?"

 

"I mean, unless you don't want to? There's two of us here and I don't run things and—"

 

"Jesus, you talk a lot." She started to laugh.

 

"I'm really fucking nervous, okay?" He pulled her a little bit closer. "I—what do you want?"

 

"When you left, the thing I missed most about having you here was having you here. Just...sitting next to you, feeling the energy between us." She searched his eyes. "Did you feel it? When we were just sitting there?"

 

"Fuck yeah. It was an arcing current. Safe for only us—and barely that."

 

"Exactly. And then it was gone—you were gone. And I've just...missed you. I know I was with Raffi and you had your anyones, but I missed you."

 

"Same."

 

"So, what I want is to get out of this room and take a walk around our ship, Captain Shaw."

 

"That sounds amazing but you realize there's an old tradition that doing that with no real destination in mind is pretty much—"

 

"A courtship walk. Do you think I learned nothing on Voyager?"

 

"Raffi has the conn?"

 

She nodded. "And she's used to me being in here and then off to some department or other. Same as you used to do." Same as Janeway did too.

 

She had trouble seeing Picard doing it though. He struck her as a captain who stayed put. But he was ops track while Janeway and Shaw came up to the big chair through other channels. Maybe that's why they were less at home just sitting on the bridge? Maybe why she was too?

 

"Well, let's go then. We'll be sending a message to the crew though."

 

"Liam, are you going to be this annoyingly cautious the entire time? Because if so, I'm going to push you against the wall and—"

 

"You're a new captain. I don't want you to send messages you're not fully prepared to send just because we're caught up in this. You can't take back the message."

 

"I'm reckless, remember? Besides, how often did we hear 'Get a room?' during our arguments?"

 

"Good point. Okay, I will cease to question your decisions regarding this."

 

"That I seriously doubt."

 

He laughed as he walked to the door and hit the panel to open it. "My lady? Shall we begin our courtship?"

 

"Yes, please." She followed him to the back lift. They rode it in silence, followed by walking in silence, but with little glances at each other, silly smiles.

 

Finally she asked, "Can we talk shop during this? Your rules are unclear."

 

He laughed. "They aren't my rules."

 

"Well they aren't my rules. I was going to kiss you up there."

 

"Of course we can talk shop."

 

"Okay, so I've been having Jack cross-train in all the departments. But I was holding off on engineering for obvious reasons. But now that you're here, I don't need to...except..."

 

"Except?"

 

"Except I can't tell if you like him or not."

 

"I wouldn't arm-wrestle someone I don't like."

 

"Oh my God, you would too. You'd do it even harder. Your veins would pop like they were doing."

 

He laughed. "Okay, yeah, maybe. But I might also have another reason for doing that. Because...you seem to really like him."

 

"You're jealous? Of Jack Crusher?" She was so enchanted by this side of him. "He reminds me of Tom Paris when I first met him."

 

"You know I know Tom and Bey, right? They totally called that I was gone on you."

 

She laughed and looked away. "B'Elanna might have said something similar to me."

 

"They're going to be insufferable when we get together with them. We have to—I really like them. You really like them, right?"

 

"I do. B'Elanna and I didn't like each other at all at first."

 

"Yeah, I may have heard about that." He grinned. "She loves you now."

 

"I know. So was that a yes for Jack?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Great. Raffi will reach out. She's in charge of his schedule."

 

"Got it. Is she okay with us?"

 

"She is. Well other than the arguing. Did you realize we stand really close?" She looked at how close they were walking and started to laugh. "You'd be lucky to get a padd between us."

 

He grinned. "You want me to move away some?"

 

"Nope."

 

"Good. And we've always done that. But in engineering you've often got multiple people working in small spaces. You can't be precious about your personal bubble."

 

"And I was a drone."

 

"Right. So we're just being us."

 

"Except we've got that arcing electrical current thing."

 

"Yeah, I love that. I can feel it now." His look was sweet and predatory. A mix she wouldn't have thought he'd be capable of but he was. It sent a tingle down her neck and spine.

 

She bit her bottom lip lightly and watched as his eyes went right to it. "You know it occurs to me that all your women of the moment might have only been for the moment because you're a horrible lover. I'm going to spend all this time...and then...?" She looked up at him with a daring look.

 

"Chance you take when you take it slow." He led her to the lift and told it, "Deck five."

 

With a grin she knew was wicked, she said, "Hold lift," then moved the very little space required to be touching him, her lips on his enough to brush lightly as she said, "I just want one kiss. Please, please, please?"

 

"Because I might suck? No other reason? A test drive, as it were?"

 

"Yes. Logical, right?"

 

"Go ahead. If you must." He acted like he couldn't care less.

 

So she leaned in, keeping her hands off him, just her lips touching his, and he moaned and opened his mouth to her.

 

Holy crap the man could kiss.

 

They kissed for a very long time, and she was leaning on him, still keeping her hands at her sides just as he was. They finally eased away and she smiled in what she knew was a very self-satisfied way.

 

"So, I'll do?" His grin was luminous and crooked and everything she loved about him.

 

"I guess."

 

"Yeah, sorry. Maybe I'll improve with practice."

 

"Yeah, I hope so." She couldn't say that without laughing because she was still leaning against him even if their lips weren't touching anymore. She felt like she needed the support and he clearly didn't mind. "You said you loved me last night."

 

"And just a bit ago. You did not say it back."

 

"I love you, Liam Shaw."

 

He just looked at her, the silence sweet, his smile even more so. Then he murmured, "That's one of our firsts. It's nice." He touched her hair gently. "I love your hair. I want to play with it so bad."

 

"I love having it played with."

 

"Ooh, match made in heaven then." He gently pushed her off from him. "Some other day for that first. Resume lift. Deck five."

 

She laughed. "This is your way of being in charge since I am otherwise."

 

"You're not wrong. But you also can override anything you don't like or don't feel comfortable with."

 

"I know. I trust you, Liam."

 

"I trust you too, Seven."

 

##

 

He was waiting for her in the lounge. The dance floor was crowded. Nobody asked him to dance since he was sitting at the bar in the way that said not to, hunched over his drink, eyes on the entrance. Waiting for her like some goddamned stalker.

 

Shit, was he being creepy?

 

Their little courtship walk had turned into a tour of some of the engineering sub-disciplines—the people who were never in main engineering and often got missed by their captain.

 

Unless their captain was an engineer. Or now when their captain could easily have been one, she was that skilled.

 

He loved how effortlessly they'd combined their first time just being together for no reason other than that with something that was work related. He didn't think either of them was the kind to just goof off for long, even when hormones were high.

 

And they had been super high after that kiss. Holy crap, her lips were even softer than he'd imagined.

 

She walked into the lounge with Raffi, laughing at something Raffi had said, and he just enjoyed how fucking beautiful she was. He didn't have to wave her over; she saw him and grabbed Raffi's hand and dragged her with her.

 

"Hi," she said almost shyly.

 

"Hello there." He looked at Raffi. "To you too." He made it as friendly as he possibly could. He didn't want to leave her out. She seemed like she'd be so fun to hang around with but they really hadn't yet.

 

"Shaw."

 

"You can call him Liam." Seven looked at him. "She can call you Liam, right?"

 

"If she wants. I think Raffi knows that, though." He grinned in a no-harm, no-foul sort of way. "I'm buying. What'll it be, ladies?"

 

Seven wanted rye for reasons known only to her and Raffi went for a ginger ale. He had another glass of wine.

 

"To new crews and old friends," he said, raising his glass.

 

They all returned the toast and drank and then Seven asked softly, "Is there a first tonight?"

 

"Do you want a first tonight?"

 

She nodded.

 

He tried to assess if Raffi was following this. She seemed to be so he thought maybe Seven had filled her in, which made him so stinking happy it was almost pathetic.

 

"We've never danced," he said. "There is a dance floor here so—"

 

"Actually we have danced."

 

"When?"

 

"Salixa. That place you kept referring to privately as Brigadoon."

 

"Okay but that was like an Irish reel."

 

"Which is a dance."

 

"But together? We touched hands maybe three times."

 

"We were always in proximity. It was a dance. That we did together."

 

"But it's not a dance dance."

 

"Oh, my God, you two. This is supposed to be when you're overwhelmed with oxytocin and making nests, and you're still arguing?" Raffi was laughing at them. "I'm going to find some sane people."

 

"Wait. Does an Irish Reel count as dancing?" Seven looked at her, and he nodded because maybe they needed an arbiter on some of these disagreements.

 

"Oh, no way in hell am I getting in the middle of this. You do you, guys. Thanks for the drink, Liam." And she was off.

 

"Rephrase and it'll be a first." Seven's look was so sexy he decided to just do what she said without making a counterpoint.

 

"We've never danced holding each other the way those folks are doing on the dance floor on this ship."

 

"Yeah, that works." She grinned at him and softly bit her lip in a way she never had before this morning, but he thought meant she was excited—and not in the way a cool new engine or species would have made her. "Can I decompress for a second, though? I had some weird calls this afternoon."

 

"Of course." He slid over so she could have the outside bar stool—Ranger Seven never liked to be pinned in with her back to part of the room. "Weird calls are the worst. Let me guess—personnel?"

 

"Contracts."

 

"You have my deepest condolences."

 

"Thank you." She took a deep sip of her drink. "And I'm good with contract language—making it tighter, and I do get why they want that—but they just won't let it go."

 

"Like Raffi thinks we won't in our arguments, only times a million."

 

"Yes." She seemed to exhale for extra long, and he remembered how that felt, letting go of all the captainly shit and just trying to be a human again.

 

"It gets better."

 

"I hope so. I had a taste of this as first officer. This should not be that much different."

 

"It is, though. The buck stops at you."

 

"Well, at least part of the day was really fun." She shoots him a glance rife with mischief.

 

"Your test drive of my lips?"

 

She nodded, biting that lip again and holy shit was he going to enjoy watching her do it, but it was also a huge tell. Maybe a sign that she was just as lost in this as he was.

 

"Yeah, it didn't suck." He laughed at her expression. "It didn't suck a lot."

 

She took another big sip and then said, "Dance floor?"

 

"Yes, ma'am."

 

It took them a minute to get comfortable, find the best way to hold, but then she settled into him, and Louis Armstrong was singing "What a Wonderful World," and it was the best song at this moment, and he was singing along softly in her ear.

 

She tightened her hold on him and just seemed to let go, to relax, and if the world ended right at this moment, he would be okay with that.

 

And then the song changed and she met his eyes with a gentle smile, and he said, "Sorry for the singing."

 

"I liked it."

 

"Then I'm not sorry."

 

"This is a nice first."

 

"Yes, it is." He knew they were staring at each other like lovesick fools, but he just couldn't bring himself to care.

 

"You've told me over and over that I'm reckless."

 

"Sevennnnnn."

 

She laughed as she put her hand on the back of his head and eased him toward her. "No rule that says we can only have one first per encounter, right?"

 

"This is a big statement, kissing on a crowded dance floor."

 

"You're right." She stopped pulling him. "So help me make it."

 

God damn she was just...every fucking thing he'd ever wanted. So he did help her, he pulled her the rest of the way and kissed her. Not a sloppy kiss but not a chaste peck either. And it wasn't short.

 

It was heaven.

 

When they eased away and kept dancing like nothing had happened, he could feel the shift in energy on the dance floor. But it wasn't a confused shift. Or an unhappy one. He looked up from staring at her and saw smiles from those who knew them both.

 

"They don't mind," she said as she sighed and put her head on his shoulder.

 

"No, they sure don't."

 

##

 

"Kissing her on the dance floor? Pretty ballsy. I'll take a refill and it's on him."

 

"Soda's free."

 

"I know but I like the idea of you paying so let me pretend. Where's our girl?"

 

"Talking to some new science ensigns."

 

"She's so happy, Liam."

 

"Is that okay with you?"

 

"Of course it's okay with me. I love her. And if you make her happy, then more power to you."

 

"She makes me happy too."

 

"I know. I can tell."

 

"Is this the part where you tell me if I hurt her you'll kill me?"

 

"Not if you already know I'm going to say it. Smart boy."

 

"I try. I don't plan to hurt her."

 

"Good. You've never asked about the sodas."

 

"My sister works the program. She and the wagon, though—they part ways more than they don't. I have only the utmost respect for you."

 

"I'm sorry about your sister. No one can make her want to not drink. She has to get there on her own."

 

"I know. It's hard though. To watch. She's my baby sister."

 

"You hide a lot under the swear words and tough/goofy exterior."

 

"Yeah. Safer to hide it."

 

"I think you don't hide it from Seven."

 

"Not anymore anyway. I wasn't always good to her."

 

"Believe me. I heard about it."

 

"I hope you only hear good things now."

 

"Me too."

 

 

 

 

7.

 

Shaw was at his desk in engineering when he heard footsteps he didn't recognize, coming fast, but not so fast they sounded pissed. A moment later Raffi was at his door. "You got a minute?"

 

"I've got a ton of them. Sit or stand if you're tired of sitting."

 

"I sort of am. Thanks." She seemed to be taking in the room, like she wasn't sure how to start the conversation.

 

"This isn't about me and Seven, is it?"

 

"Oh, no. And that would be super hypocritical of me if it was." She studied him. "I'm trying to figure out how far I can trust you."

 

"Far."

 

"Hmmm."

 

He laughed. "Or not. Let me know when you're done figuring that out." And he went back to the note he was reading from Command.

 

She sat. "It's about Crusher. He's due to report to you beginning of next week."

 

"Yep."

 

"I want—" She sighed and he turned to look at her. "Seven lets him get away with murder."

 

"I thought I was the only one who thought that."

 

"No. And I get why she does. The shared screwed-up childhoods. The Borg thing. And he is useful—"

 

"What does he do, exactly? I've never been sure."

 

She got up, closed the door, and sat back down. "Pretty much what he did when he wasn't in Starfleet."

 

"Criminal shit?"

 

"Wellllllll..."

 

"Is this why she's living in the rules and regulations database? To make sure she's not asking him to break any?"

 

"Maybe. Look, I don't want to interfere with that. But he needs some tough love. And you are the master of that from what I'm getting after talking to so many here when I first reported. They love you but you were considered tough—until you trusted someone."

 

He nodded. That was pretty much how he rolled. "Can I flog him?"

 

She burst out laughing. "No."

 

He started to laugh too. "So there's a limit to how tough the love should be?"

 

She laughed again. "Just...you and I, we love Starfleet. Put a little of the Fleet iron in his backbone. I know he's been through hell, but I also know you've spent time there too when you were younger. I have faith you can make him earn his keep and learn some regs and rules and protocol without being miserable—and maybe pass some ethics on. I'm not sure his mom did."

 

"Yeah." He frowned. "Why did you have to decide if you could trust me with that? I'm one of your section heads." Even if his appraisals would be written at Command.

 

"Because I wasn't sure if this conversation would get back to Seven."

 

"What conversation?"

 

She smiled. "Thank you. I'll let you get back to it."

 

Before she could get up, he said, "For what it's worth, you're always welcome. To hang out with us, I mean."

 

"You don't mind a third wheel?"

 

"No. And sometimes Ohk will be there."

 

"I don't think she likes me."

 

He laughed. "She doesn't like anyone. Not at first anyway. Give her time. Once she lets you in, she's...well, not warm, exactly. But interesting."

 

She laughed. "Okay. Yeah, maybe I will join you guys sometimes."

 

"Are you saying that because you don't want to hang out with us because we're not fun to hang out with or because it's painful for you to have to do it?"

 

"I see how happy Seven is and it's not a happy that I ever made her. The part of me that's her friend is thrilled for her. But the part of me that maybe still loves her a little—well, she resents the hell out of you."

 

"Understandable. I'd feel the same in your place."

 

"So I love the welcome. And I probably will do it. But if I wander off, maybe it got to be too much." Her serious expression changed. "Or I saw someone I wanted to talk to. It can be hard to tell with me."

 

He smiled. "Okay. And I don't think you should discount the important role you played for her. I'm not sure she'd ever been properly loved before you. I'm damn sure she wouldn't be ready for me without knowing how it feels because I was an ass to her. You were crucial."

 

"Okay, I'm starting to see what she sees in you." She was smiling in a pleased way. "You were in love with her when she was serving under you. I saw it so clearly when Worf and I were on the ship the first time. But you never did anything?"

 

He shook his head. "It was her first assignment. I thought I was headed to retirement or a desk job so for me it probably wouldn't have mattered if I wanted to fraternize, but it wouldn't have been fair to her. Also I was a dick—partially overcompensating for how stupidly in love I was with her. And I wasn't sure if she...I mean there was chemistry, but she can hold those cards pretty fucking close to the chest."

 

"Yeah. I get that. What do you think of Chakotay?"

 

He rolled his eyes. "I'd have spaced him."

 

"Really?"

 

"She was so young. I mean if you consider she was six when taken and spent five years in a maturation chamber—and yeah, I know there was that unimatrix thing where she got to be human, but she was a drone for the rest of the time. So how old was she really? Emotionally? She probably should have been dating Icheb, not mothering him."

 

"Wow. Don't ever say that to her."

 

"I wouldn't. I guess I'm trusting you too, huh?" He looked down. "Do you disagree?"

 

"No actually. But she's so smart. Intellectually she was in her twenties, physically too. I guess it didn't matter that emotionally she had some catch-up to do."

 

"But it fucking well should have."

 

"Yeah, it should have." She smiled. "We never had this conversation either."

 

"Good. Although I don't regret not having it." He grinned.

 

"Me either, Liam."

 

##

 

Seven rang for admittance to Shaw's quarters and heard him say, "Come."

 

She walked in and there was soft music playing, a bunch of finger food, and a ton of pillows on the bed. "I take it we're dining on the bed?"

 

"Unless you prefer a table." He grinned at her.

 

"Eating with you on a bed is a first." They'd eaten in his old quarters, now hers, before. But done it like normal people.

 

"I thought something lighter than Malbec tonight. You willing to join me in wine?"

 

"Is it Chateau Picard?" She laughed at his expression. "Didn't think so. And yes."

 

"It's an Alsace Riesling."

 

"I actually love that." She frowned. "Didn't we have it at one of those command team meet and greets?"

 

"We did. Admiral Fashton served it."

 

"Right." She moved very close to him.

 

"Uhhhh?"

 

"Kiss me. It's no longer a first so I am within my rights to demand it."

 

"Well, technically, kissing in my quarters is a first."

 

"There is a limit to how many ways you can parse first times."

 

"No, there's not." He was grinning as he said it.

 

"There is if I get tired of it."

 

"And cut me off entirely? Find a new lover?"

 

"Sadly, yes."

 

"Fuck, you're harsh." He put the wine down and pulled her to him a little roughly and she found herself grinning. "Fine but kissing you isn't my idea of fun."

 

But he did it so damn well. She put her arms around his neck and held on for dear life.

 

He was moaning too by the time he finished. As he eased away, he smiled and said, "Kiss me all you want, but nothing more tonight."

 

"Your rules are stupid." She watched him pour the wine and then took a glass and sipped. "Your wine however is not."

 

He took a taste. "Mmm, so good." He held his glass to her. "To stupid rules and kissing you all night long."

 

She clinked her glass gently against his. "And you can play with my hair."

 

"But not while we're eating."

 

"Correct." She laughed. "I'm going to play with yours too."

 

He looked concerned.

 

"Not the top part—I know how fussy you are about it. Back here." She reached around, slowly slid her hand from the nape of his neck up, keeping the touch light, almost ticklish.

 

"Oh, holy hell, yes." He had his eyes closed and she was pretty sure would go boneless if she continued so she stopped. "Go lie down, Seven. This is the real test. Which side of the bed..." He pretended to be scared.

 

"I'm agnostic. There is no bed for drones so I really don't care."

 

"Good, because I like the right side."

 

She walked around to the left side, put her wine on the nightstand, and made herself comfortable. "Actually, now that you mention it, when I was President Hansen, I slept on the left. So I guess when allowed to express my own preferences..."

 

"We're compatible."

 

"On that issue, yes."

 

"Ooof. Tough grader tonight." He put his wine on his nightstand, put a tray of food between them, and got comfortable as she steadied the tray.

 

She studied the selection. "You chose this because we could feed each other, didn't you?"

 

"Actually I just didn't want to have to use utensils, but your idea works too." He held out a piece of cheese and she took it delicately.

 

Then she picked out a cracker, lovingly loaded it up with salami and more cheese and some bell pepper, and ate it.

 

"Hey!" He was laughing.

 

"Oh, did you think I would feed you? Silly man." But she held out a grape to him. "I'm not going to peel it, so don't ask."

 

He definitely had been about to ask because he had to bite back a comment. But he took it nicely. He reached back for the wine and sipped, watching her as she made another salami/cheese/pepper cracker.

 

This time she held it out for him and he took it with his fingers and not his mouth.

 

"The feeding each other phase didn't last long."

 

He laughed and said, "Yeah, I'm too practical." He took a bite. "Mmm, good combo. Try this instead of the pepper." He pointed to the sun-dried tomatoes.

 

She did and smiled. "Good. But I prefer the pepper."

 

"More tomatoes for me then. Did you get any comments from our bridge children?"

 

"About the kiss?" She laughed. "Not directly. Well, except for Sidney, who made a squealing noise and said she was so happy for us."

 

"Vintage La Forge." But he grinned. This was important to him, she could tell. "Was Jack jealous of me?"

 

"Yeah, seething." She rolled her eyes. "Why is there no fruit here?"

 

"There's grapes. Those are fruit."

 

"But other fruit."

 

He sighed and got up. "Because it's the dessert."

 

"I want it now."

 

"Yeah I got the message. That's why I'm up instead of lounging royally."

 

She laughed and took the plates of berries from him and arranged them on the tray. "Much better. Thank you."

 

"You don't like dessert?"

 

"I don't like dessert when it's a course that doesn't need to be there, and I'd rather be lying on this bed with no tray between us."

 

"Good answer. Long answer, but good." He snatched a raspberry. "I love these. I've never ever had a sour one. I mean you can pick them too soon, but once red..."

 

"There are golden ones too. I love those."

 

"You can provide them sometime."

 

"I will." She held a strawberry out to him by the stem and he bit it free. "Those on the other hand can be disappointing. They look good but aren't always."

 

"So true. But this is a good one."

 

"How do you know Tom and B'Elanna?"

 

"She and I were at the Academy together. Before she left. We were friends. Engineers that had no tolerance for anyone who couldn't keep up."

 

"I can imagine."

 

"You'd have been just as bad. Only over in the science cadre probably."

 

"Probably so. So you met Tom after Voyager returned?"

 

"Yeah, but I really like him."

 

"I do too. I really do see a lot of him in Jack. But there was never interest in Tom and I know you know there's none in Jack, right?"

 

"Intellectually, I knew that. But a man get's jealous anyway—the little brain overtakes the big one."

 

"Yes, blame all stupid things on your penis."

 

"I will." He laughed. "But it doesn't sound like you'll buy it."

 

She gave him a stern look. They went back to eating and talking and then there was less eating and more glances and he finally took the tray away and lay back down.

 

"Where did you get all these pillows?" At the funny look he gave her she sighed. "The quartermaster has this many pillows?"

 

"Hey, you never know when we'll have to ferry alien royalty who dig pillows."

 

"True." She moved a little to get more comfortable. "They are nice."

 

He moved closer to her, his pupils enlarging and she smiled the most seductive smile she could. And then he was kissing her and rolling to his back, pulling her on top of him.

 

She could feel how much he wanted her, could feel the fluttering in her belly that she associated with lust. But she knew he'd stop her if she tried to grind.

 

Still, why not make him?

 

"Seven, damn it all." He dumped her off him and laughed. "You are such a troublemaker."

 

"You want me."

 

"I do."

 

"I want you." She reached for him but he kept her hands up and away from his groin. "Points for willpower, I have to say."

 

"Yeah, go me." He finally had to sort of lie over her to get her to stop, and she laughed and gave up.

 

And then they kissed, like she imagined teenagers do when they're first in love, hands moving over each other but not going under, not going into. And whoever was on top got their hair played with.

 

There was much moaning and murmurs of "I love you" and he got up to refill the wine but ended up just bringing the bottle over.

 

She was getting sleepy and he said, "Stay with me," and she smiled and said, "Our first sleepover" and then she curled into him and let him play with her hair until she fell asleep.

 

She woke up spooning him. She'd slept so easily with him. Something she didn't always do.

 

She kissed him awake and said, "I love you. I have a breakfast meeting with some new crew."

 

"I love you too. See you later." And he rolled over and went back to sleep.

 

She worried they hadn't bothered to set the alarm. "Computer is alarm set?"

 

"Negative."

 

"Set alarm for normal time."

 

"Alarm set for 0730."

 

He had another hour to sleep. Lucky man. She hurried out before she could be tempted to curl back into him and sleep too.

 

##

 

"Well, look who found her way to engineering. Breakfast go well?"

 

"It did. You sleep okay last night?"

 

"You know I did. I had you next to me. Those pillows are really comfortable."

 

"Half of them were on the floor."

 

"Yeah, well, they gave their lives for a good cause. Are you here on business or...?"

 

"Business actually. Jack's going to be with you next week."

 

"Yep."

 

"Raffi thinks I'm too easy on him. I've held her back but I won't do that to you. If you think he needs your brand of management."

 

"My brand?"

 

"Quit laughing. You know what I mean."

 

"You defied my brand constantly."

 

"That doesn't mean I didn't learn what mattered."

 

"Done."

 

"Thank you. I see myself in him. I see Tom Paris in him. And I can't bring myself to..."

 

"You have to get over that."

 

"I will. In time. But even experienced horse people send their new ones to someone else to be trained."

 

"He's not a horse."

 

"The analogy is still apt."

 

"Yeah, I'm sure he'd be thrilled to think you called him a horse."

 

"We're not going to tell him, Liam."

 

"God, we really do argue over everything, don't we?"

 

"It's our way. Every couple has...rituals."

 

"Ah, yes, the sacred sacrament of those who are determined never to agree on the first attempt."

 

"Exactly. And we'll have all our firsts. Last night's were nice."

 

"They were nice. I never, ever slept over with those anyones."

 

"No?"

 

"No. Never. Just with you."

 

"I love you so much. I sometimes don't know what to do with it—the feeling."

 

"Right there with you."

 

"This is new for me."

 

"For me too. I never just fall. I have guidelines and guard rails."

 

"Yes. But not this time. If we crash..."

 

"We die. So let's not crash, Seven."

 

"Okay. I'm a good pilot."

 

"Good because I'm not."

 

"I'll get us home safe."

 

"I know you will. And I'll keep the engines running so you can steer."

 

"Sounds perfect. I'll see you later."

 

"Count on it."

 

 

8.

 

The captain's dining room was set up beautifully and Seven thanked the crewmen working on it then went to get Liam.

 

She found him working with Jack under a panel and stood listening, knowing that he probably knew she was there because he knew her signature stomp.

 

"Forty One," Jack said, and she frowned. That number made no sense with regards to the place they were working.

 

"Those have to do with...state of crew quarters. Okay, go for it."

 

"Roaches are mentioned twice."

 

"Voles are. Roaches? Lie, dude."

 

"Fuck. For what it's worth we had roaches on our ships."

 

"I don't want to know."

 

She coughed gently and they both rolled out.

 

"Hey, Cap'n." Liam grinned at her and gave the little wink that confirmed he'd known she was there. "We're playing stump the King of Regs."

 

"Also known as truth or lie," Jack said with a big grin.

 

"I see. Why?"

 

"Because if Jack trips me up, I have to do one of the tedious or gross jobs he will eventually be doing with him."

 

"And if he doesn't trip you up?"

 

"I keep trying. I live in that fucking database. Sidney is so over it."

 

She laughed at the cruel genius that was Liam Shaw. He'd taken Jack's urge to compete and win and rolled it into learning the rules and regs.

 

"Whatever works, boys. Liam, we have guests coming. Clean up."

 

"Wait, wait, wait. Are you using the dining room?"

 

"Yes, Jack. We're dining so..."

 

"Okay, I remember this one. You have to talk shop thirty percent—"

 

"Thirty-three," Liam said softly.

 

"Thirty-three percent of the time or the cost of the meal comes out of your personal allowance."

 

She blinked and thought back to all the dinners she'd attended that Liam had hosted. He'd always managed to insert shop talk. Even when it was weird.

 

"Good to know. Thank you. Fortunately, B'Elanna is your boss, I guess, Liam. So no hardship for you."

 

"And you can flirt with Tom."

 

"I don't flirt with Tom."

 

"Has she ever flirted with you, Crusher. You look like Tom."

 

"Not that I can recall." He seemed sincere and Liam smiled.

 

She rolled her eyes. "Can we go? I want to change and you're keeping Jack past shift."

 

"Oh, no, we were on a roll with the regs and I really thought I was going to get him. Plus we're almost done with this." Jack looked at Liam. "Do you want me to finish up?"

 

"Yes. Thank you." He slid his roller over to her and held out his hand. "Give me a hand. Your man is old."

 

"Bullshit. You just want to get my hands greasy."

 

"No grease, Captain. I think he just wants to touch you. Young love is so sweet." Jack winked and slid back under the panel.

 

"You trust him?" she mouthed as she took his hand and pulled him up.

 

"Yep," he said as he reached down to grab the roller and stow it. As they headed out of Engineering, he said, "He learned so many things being on the run for so long. It's kind of crazy."

 

"And you made regulations fun. Look at you."

 

He smiled. "He almost caught me today. I had to guess. Don't tell him that though. Don't want him getting cocky."

 

"He's already cocky."

 

"Well, cockier then." He followed her into the lift but as soon as the door closed said, "Hold lift." And pulled her into his arms. "I missed you."

 

She melted into him, then eased away. "I guess I missed you. Resume lift."

 

Anyone else might have been hurt at the cold way she'd said it, he just pulled her to him and kissed her forehead.

 

"And you just asked Jack if I flirt with him."

 

"It was an easy way to find out how he feels about you."

 

"Way to be stupidly jealous still."

 

"To be honest, I'm not jealous anymore. The kid grew up being left out of everything. He was in so many fucking schools it's ridiculous. He'd just get comfy and then Beverly would yank him out and run again." He shook his head. "He longs to be included. I was including him."

 

Just when she thought she understood how his mind worked, he went and surprised her. "That's why he's working so hard to get you with the regs. He wants more time with you."

 

"Yep. Eventually he'll find one I don't know. Like you did. And then he'll have the win and the time. And you'll have an officer who can quote official policy backwards and forwards."

 

"I love you, Captain Shaw."

 

"I am pretty awesome." He laughed at her expression. "Do I have to shower?"

 

She got close enough to assess. "No, just change into something casual." They parted ways once they got off the lift, and she changed in her quarters quickly and found him waiting by the lift.

 

"Shuttle bay to Captain Seven."

 

"Seven here."

 

"Admiral Torres and Captain Paris's shuttle is safely aboard."

 

"Let's go see it. They took some of the specs from the Delta Flyer."

 

"I know. I consulted from afar."

 

She frowned. "So did I. While we were both on the ship. And we never talked about it to each other."

 

"No, we sure didn't." He sighed. "We wasted so much fucking time."

 

"Well, now we won't."

 

He pushed back her hair. "Our first dinner with friends."

 

She leaned in and kissed him quickly, then took his hand and he swung it as they waited for the lift, and then when they were off it and walking to the shuttle bay.

 

The whimsy of the man never failed to surprise—and charm the hell out of her.

 

##

 

Shaw tried to get over his jealousy that Tom and Bey had such an amazing shuttle for their private use. It was even more special that both he and Seven had a hand in it.

 

"So Risa was good?" he asked as he led them to the dining room, then realized Seven should really be doing that. But she had her arm looped with Tom's and didn't seem to care that he'd taken over.

 

"It was so good. I'm glad to see you've settled in, Liam," Bey said softly, grinning at him. "She's the happiest I've ever seen her. Maybe you two need to go to Risa?"

 

He laughed. "We're taking it slow."

 

"Of course you are, you big softie." She bumped against him. "I do want to talk about some work things. Can we do it at dinner? I don't want to spoil the joy with engineering minutia if we should wait until after."

 

"No, let's do it while we eat. After should just be fun." Plus that whole thirty-three percent thing. Did Bey not know that or were admirals not required to follow that? Or were guests to Command automatically deemed business?

 

Which was lame. Relatives and friends were much more likely to visit a stationary building than a moving starship. But nobody asked him to weigh in on the rules.

 

Once they were seated, Bey looked at Seven and said, "So I guess you like this big mook after all?"

 

"He's okay."

 

"Wow, Liam. You've made it to the 'just okay' category. Way to overachieve."

 

Seven laughed. "Don't try to take him away and you'll find out how much I like him."

 

"Ooh, that sounded terrifying. I approve." Bey lifted her glass to them. "To finally realizing you were in love with the person you thought you detested."

 

"I never detested her." He looked at her. She was being so quiet. "Did you detest me?"

 

"Detest is a strong word. Loathe, maybe." She was laughing. "Fine, was aggravated by. How's that?"

 

"Oh for sure that."

 

He reached across the table for her hand and she took it and Bey said softly, "I think I'm going to be sick." But she was smiling as she said it.

 

"So, Admiral Torres," Seven said after the servers had put down the first course. "You have your own shuttle. I know you didn't just stop here to say hello. What's up?" Then she looked at Tom. "Or are you here on Kathryn's behalf?"

 

"We promised her we would stop in and check to make sure you two hadn't killed each other. That's actually it. We'll be out of your hair after dinner."

 

"Don't be silly, Tom. Stay and enjoy guest quarters." He realized he'd said that like a captain. "I mean..."

 

Seven rolled her eyes. "He speaks for both of us. Stay."

 

"I want to see the engines."

 

"Of course you do, Bey. Seven can show Tom whatever it is he's into."

 

"It varies by the minute." Bey grinned at Tom in the way Shaw loved, the way he hoped he and Seven would be looking at each other years from now.

 

They really were his role models for a relationship.

 

##

 

"Mmm, Captain Shaw, why are you at my quarters?"

 

"We've never done a sleepover in here."

 

"You're right. Come in."

 

"It's nice having them here."

 

"It is. Do you think they really just stopped by to check on us?"

 

"It's hard to tell. But Bey might have felt bad, might have pulled me if we really weren't getting along. Maybe that's why they just showed up. She wanted to see us without a lot of prep on our part."

 

"Did she grill you when you were looking at the engines."

 

"Moderately. Did Tom grill you?"

 

"Little bit. Do we have to talk about them now that you are here, with me, all alone?"

 

"Why, Captain Seven. What are you suggesting?"

 

"..."

 

"Never let anyone say you can't kiss, Liam."

 

"Who said that? I'll fight them. Don't laugh. I would."

 

"Uh huh. Just come to bed. I want to kiss you more than that."

 

"Well, never let it be said I left a lady wanting."

 

"Yeah, jury's still out on that. Because we're taking it slow. I have no idea if you'll leave me wanting or not."

 

"I won't. Just trust me."

 

"I do trust you. And if you're lousy in bed, I'll just retrain you."

 

"Of that I have no doubt."

 

 

9.

 

Liam saw Raffi alone in a booth and said, "Got room for two more?"

 

She frowned. "Seven's joining us?"

 

"Honestly, I don't know. She needed some me time last night and I haven't seen her yet this morning. But she loves the danish and the cook makes them for her special."

 

"Yes, do not try to get between their love."

 

He laughed. "Won't. I benefit too. He never makes just one."

 

"Same. She brings them up to the bridge sometimes." She sipped her coffee as he ate. "So Jack Crusher quoted me a regulation I wasn't following the other day. So annoying. Also, well done, you."

 

He grinned. "Sidney's going to kill me though."

 

"Yes. Yes, she is. I may eventually help her." Her smile is too good natured to take that seriously. "I won't ask how you did it."

 

"Actually you should. I think it's the secret to getting him Fleeted up. He grew up lonely. He longs for inclusion."

 

"I know how that feels."

 

"Right. JL's favorite, intel star, protege of Klingons."

 

"I was drummed out, Liam. Multiple addictions, paranoia—although to be fair to me, I was right. But who listens to a Cassandra? I lived alone in the desert until JL found me for his first wacky mission to save something."

 

"I didn't realize. I'm sorry I mocked."

 

"It's been partitioned off my normal record. No reason you should have seen it if you checked while we were all working together on the changeling thing."

 

"I'm glad they did that. You're too good to have to carry that around. They may have done that for me after I acted out after Wolf 359."

 

"You? Mister Rules and Regs?"

 

"I know. It's near unfathomable these days." He saw Seven come in. She seemed very far away. "Sev."

 

She walked over.

 

"Are you okay?" Raffi asked putting a weird spin on the whole thing.

 

"Yeah. Just... Yeah." She touched his shoulder gently, as if telling him whatever was going on with her wasn't to do with him.

 

"We saved you room," he said. "Sit across from whoever you want to look at most."

 

Raffi laughed at the way he phrased it. He'd worked on it for just such an occasion.

 

"I've got calls. And then...it's going to be busy all day. And night. But not tomorrow."

 

Raffi exhibited no surprise at this so he just smiled and said, "Have a good day."

 

"You too. I'll be in my ready room, Raff. The conn's yours when you come up." Then with a last squeeze to his shoulder, she walked away, got food quickly, and hurried out.

 

He watched her go. "Okay that was so weird."

 

"She wasn't distant last year on this day? Or the year before?"

 

He frowned and pulled out his padd. "She took sick leave. Both days. She's never sick." Why hadn't he noticed? He cross-checked his schedule. Last year he'd been at meetings on Vulcan. Year before he hadn't known her well enough to realize she was never fucking sick. "So tell me what's going on. Or do I need to ask her?"

 

"Do you know about Icheb?"

 

"Yeah, she told me about him that first year, about killing the woman who murdered him. We were working together in engineering and it was super late and we'd been at it for hours and we just started sharing shit."

 

Her eyebrows lift. "She told you. Wow. Okay." She shook her head. "I need to get used to the idea that you and she had something I never got."

 

"Time stuck with each other?"

 

She nodded. "She couldn't run out on you."

 

"Except for on this day, apparently. Is it the day he died?"

 

She nodded.

 

"Fuck. Did she share it with you? Do you know how down she gets?"

 

"I don't. She disappeared. But then she was always doing that so it wasn't that odd for me. For you, it's new and you two are joined—wherever you're joined and I assume it's not the hip—so it must feel strange."

 

He nodded as he sipped his coffee but he didn't like this. More than a decade of marking this day alone did not bode well for other sad moments.

 

He just had to decide how to approach this.

 

##

 

Seven was lying on her bed, watching videos of Icheb that Kathryn had compiled for her years ago. She didn't cry anymore. What was the point?

 

He was gone and it was both at her hands and her fault. If she'd never told Bjayzl about him, he never would have died.

 

She didn't deserve the mercy of tears.

 

Or the mercy of comfort that she knew Liam would give her.

 

She was pouring another glass of bourbon and about to hit replay for the twentieth time when her chime rang.

 

"Don't come."

 

It rang again.

 

"Don't come."

 

It rang again. God, this must be how Liam used to feel when she sat on the fucking thing. She slid off the bed and stomped to the door, ready to give whoever it was hell.

 

But it was Liam. And he smiled gently and said, "I know what day this is. Raffi told me. Tell me to go away and I will. But I'd rather not."

 

"I have to do this alone." It was out before she could call it back.

 

"Have to?"

 

She nodded even as she was moving aside, letting him in.

 

He didn't touch her, just moved to the couch and sat as she curled back up on the bed.

 

"Do you want some?" She gestured to the bourbon.

 

"No, I'm good." He didn't look away, his gaze so soft and accepting that it made her want to go to him.

 

"I need to tell you something. Something I never told Raffi—or Picard. Or Kathryn or B'Elanna or any of them."

 

"Okay."

 

"It may change the way you look at me."

 

"I seriously doubt that but okay."

 

She sat up, facing him, feet on the floor. She would be an adult as she told him the truth, not some wounded child. "Bjayzl took Icheb, she had the doctors cut him up without anesthesia. You know that part."

 

He nodded.

 

"But I came in before they were done. I killed them all and I tried to help him but it was..." She didn't look away from him, wanted to see his reaction.

 

She could tell when he got it. He murmured, "Too late."

 

"But it wasn't going to be quick. And he wanted to go. He wanted me to do it." She had to stop because she was crying like it was that day, holding her son, knowing it was the last time she'd hear his voice. "I killed him, Liam. I killed my own son."

 

His expression didn't change. All he said was, "Technically."

 

There was so much mercy in that one word. "Yes, technically. But—"

 

"No goddamn buts. She murdered him. You just took care of the son who you loved. The way you should have."

 

"Except that I told her about him. I was so proud of him and I thought she was good."

 

"That's not on you, Seven. You didn't know."

 

"But I was a Ranger. I should have."

 

"You were also a woman cut off from everyone she loved and everything she knew, in a shit part of the Federation, trying to make a difference, with a woman who seemed to want to do the same thing. How the fuck could you have known?" He got up and walked to her, sitting next to her. "You shouldn't even have been out there. Starfleet should have taken you. Your friends should have found you something. You should not have had to be a Ranger." He sounded so angry but for her, not at her. "This is not on you. None of it."

 

He held his arms open and she collapsed into him, crying the way she'd wanted to—with someone else—only she'd never felt like she could. "Don't tell Raffi."

 

"Why not?" He eased her away so she had to look at him. "She loves you. I wouldn't be here right now if she wasn't as generous as she is—she could have kept me in the dark, given you another horrible day alone. But she didn't. She deserves to know, Seven."

 

"It's my story to tell."

 

"Are you saying you want me to go?"

 

"No. Just...I'm not sure I want to tell her. Can't it just be ours?"

 

He looked disappointed in her.

 

"I didn't share with her the way I should have. I'm afraid telling her this now will only remind her of all that."

 

He narrowed his eyes, then finally nodded. "It's your call." He rose and said, "I know you want to be alone."

 

"I don't. Actually."

 

"No?"

 

She picked up the padd. "Can I show you him? Videos. Stills. Our life together and apart."

 

"Yes. I'd love that. If you want me to go after that, just say so."

 

"I'd rather you stayed the night. Held me."

 

"I can do that, Seven. I can always do that."

 

##

 

"Oh, God, what did Jack do now, Raffi?"

 

"Nothing. I just had a talk with Seven. About Icheb. She told me you thought she needed to tell me."

 

"You told me about it being the day he died. I'd have never known why she was in the mood she was otherwise. It was only fair."

 

"And you are fair, aren't you?"

 

"She thought it would hurt you. Did it?"

 

"No. It explains a lot, to be honest. It also explains why she kept Elnor at arms' length. Why she had zero interest in Gabe and Pel and my granddaughter."

 

"Does it explain Jack, too?"

 

"Yeah. I think it adds to the puzzle for sure of why she's so smitten with him."

 

"Every little piece helps make the picture."

 

"The picture I see is that she let you in when she never did me. If I had any hopes—any illusions—left that you and she are just a flash in the pan, they're gone."

 

"I'm sorry."

 

"Well, to be honest, I didn't have that many left."

 

 

10.

 

Explosions rocked the area and Seven levered Raffi into a fireman's carry as two of the security officers grabbed Shaw and put him between them, helping him walk.

 

"How bad are you hurt, Liam?" she yelled back at him forcing herself to go through smoke to a building in an area already hit but still standing—sort of.

 

It was not a good choice, but it was the best one they had.

 

"Knee is shot. I'm fine otherwise. Just give me a regenerator and I'm good."

 

"Sir, there's bone poking through," one of the security officers said.

 

"Yeah, well, that's sadly not new."

 

She smiled because she could tell he was in pain but hiding it behind jokes for the rest of the away team.

 

"Put me down, Seven," Raffi said into her back. "I'm about to throw up."

 

"Close your eyes. Just a few more minutes and we'll have cover."

 

"I hate you." But she went still and Seven could hear her reciting the twelve steps.

 

Good, her memory—for that anyway—was okay.

 

"Seven to Enterprise, what the hell did we beam into?"

 

No answer.

 

She could hear Raffi say, "Shit" just as Liam murmured, "Fuck."

 

Well, at least they were all agreed that this was a cluster. She eased Raffi down with the help of their geoscience specialist Damato and asked him, "Do you know how to work a medical scanner, Commander?"

 

"Yes, ma'am."

 

She handed it over, had the security officer with the regenerator give it to him, and took Damato's tricorder, checking the building for weak points. "We're okay here. No one go past that third window though. The supports are weak."

 

A chorus of "Yes, ma'am" was her answer.

 

Damato waved her over. "Scalp wound, superficial, but that's why all the blood. Highly vascular area. I've addressed it with the regenerator."

 

"Excellent. Internal injuries?"

 

"Not that I can see. Concussion, though. I trained as a field medic during the Dominion War."

 

"Good, thank you, Commander. If you could check Shaw...?"

 

"On it, Captain."

 

Raffi had pulled out her padd and was trying to wipe blood out of her eyes, so Seven tore off part of her jacket and used it to clean her off. "Thanks, Sev. What the hell is going on? This was supposed to be a simple trade mission."

 

"Captain," the other security officer said. They looked alike. This one was...Grey. "I'm getting readings of Shaveli weapons."

 

"How far?" The Shaveli had started making incursions after the Borg invasion, obviously thinking—correctly, sadly—that Starfleet was down enough personnel and so fixated on plugging security leaks that they wouldn't rush to defend outer worlds.

 

"Enterprise to Away Team." Esmar's voice had never sounded better to her.

 

"Seven here."

 

"Shaveli cruisers. Three of them. We got them on the run but saw no signs of beam up of Shaveli on the surface. I have your location but we did take some damage—transporters are temporarily out. I can send a shuttle."

 

"From the sound of it, they're using large munitions. I don't want to risk losing one on landing." She looked back at Liam, who definitely was not walking anytime soon to a safer spot. That was for sure bone poking out. "A high altitude pass over us to emergency-transport some better firepower would be welcome."

 

"We need La Forge at the helm, ma'am." That was Mura, telling her that things were maybe not as swell as Esmar was making it sound.

 

"Crusher, you up for it?"

 

"I live for this shit, Captain."

 

"Shaw's rubbed off on your language, Ensign. Okay, phaser rifles, portable mirror shield, thermal blankets, rations and water."

 

"You've got it."

 

"And a better regenerator," Damato murmured.

 

"You've got injured?"

 

"Do not beam down with the stuff, Jack. Damato's got it under control." She looked at Damato to make sure and he nodded. "Liam's knee is beyond fucked."

 

"What is it with him and bones?"

 

"Shut it, Crusher," Liam said, clearly in pain.

 

"And some pain meds," she said under her breath.

 

"Understood. I'm going to add other things Damato will need. Be right there with your supply drop."

 

Sadly, during his life of crime or helping people—she was pretty sure it depended on the day—he'd probably done this kind of thing more times than any of them had.

 

##

 

Shaw was trying to hide how much his knee and leg were hurting but he saw Seven keep looking back at him and knew he was failing. Fortunately the explosions, mercifully getting further away, hid the occasional groan he let out.

 

"Crusher to Seven. Transporting now."

 

"Affirmative."

 

Grey and Sinclair ran out to get the packet and brought it in. They got the rifles and took up position as Seven brought a stasis cast over.

 

Those things felt great once they were in place—but getting them there was pure hell.

 

"No, put up the mirror shield first."

 

"You will cry out when this goes on. I want to use the explosions to cover your cries. This shield will hide our life signs but not sounds."

 

"No, the new models will. They just came in. Jack and I tested one out. I had him sit inside one and yell all the court martial offenses. Couldn't hear a thing."

 

"Fine." She left him and worked with the rest to put them up.

 

He thought Raffi looked a little wobbly but had a feeling getting her to stay down was a losing battle. He could tell Seven wanted to test the thing once it was up but murmured, "If the lights are green, we're fine, Captain. Trust your engineer."

 

He could tell she didn't want to. But she finally nodded, took the rifle from Grey and handed it to Raffi and said, "You two have watch while we do this."

 

Then she and Grey came to either side of him, and Shaw said, "Now the fun part starts."

 

She gave him her left hand and murmured, "It won't break. No matter how hard you squeeze."

 

Grey tried to get him to hold his but he shook his head and said, "Yours will break, Grey. And we need you to be able to fight. But I appreciate the offer." He looked at Damato. "I assume you need me on my right side so you can work on the left?"

 

"You've done this before, sir."

 

"Sadly yes." He rolled to his right and Seven moved so he could still hold on to her. "Distract me, for the love of God."

 

"I see fields of green. Red roses, too." She was singing very softly but holy crap her voice was good.

 

"Now I feel bad for making you listen to me croon. Gorgeous voice."

 

She smiled and started over. From the entrance he heard Raffi join in—in really pretty harmony. Damato just paid attention to torturing him, but he heard Grey and Sinclair coming in on the title line, "And I think to myself: what a wonderful world."

 

"Oh, shit," he said, squeezing down on her hand, sure he was hurting her but she stopped singing long enough to say, "I'm fine. As hard as you need to." Then she went back to singing, her eyes full of concern as the rest joined in.

 

"Got it, sir," Damato said. "I'm so sorry."

 

"Pain meds." Raffi tossed them to him. "Good stuff too."

 

Damato smiled. "You will be useless to us but feeling no pain."

 

"Hey, my brain still works." But then Damato shot him full of the pain meds. "Man, Jack and his mommy make the best painkiller cocktails." He grinned like a fool. "Did I cry?"

 

"Little bit, yeah." Seven wiped his face with the already bloody piece of cloth.

 

"Nice. Jesus."

 

Grey laughed and took over, folding the thing so he got a clean part.

 

"Thank God for security officers. There when you need them."

 

Grey grinned. "We go way back, sir."

 

"That we do, Lieutenant. Did I cry a lot?"

 

"No. An appropriate amount."

 

Seven rolled her eyes and Grey handed her the cloth and went to help Raffi.

 

"I didn't expect a serenade from all of you, Sev. That was beautiful." He grinned at Damato. "Thanks for keeping your mind on business."

 

"I have a voice like a fox in mortal peril. You do not want me joining the quartet."

 

"Noted, Commander. Talent night you will not be slated for singing." Seven smiled at him, such an easy smile—she was such a fucking great captain, and Shaw was so fucking proud of her, and goddamn these really were the best fucking drugs. "Go to sleep, Liam," she whispered, giving him a kiss on the forehead before going to join Raffi.

 

"That's my girl," he told Damato.

 

"Yes, sir."

 

"She's the fucking best."

 

"Yes, sir."

 

"I'mgonnagotosleepnow."

 

"That's a great idea, sir."

 

"Damnstraightitis. I'mfullofgreatideas." And he closed his eyes and was gone.

 

##

 

"Welcome back, Captain."

 

"Situation report, Mister Mura?"

 

"The Shaveli fighters are contained. Their vessels have left the sector."

 

"Contained...I expected prisoners. Mura, where are the prisoners?"

 

"Well, our transporters still aren't working, which is why we sent the shuttle for you."

 

"Mura wanted to make sure that we were clear of enemy combatants before we sent it, but since you guys couldn't move, they had to. We knew our transporters weren't operational but the shuttles were."

 

"You flew them in shuttles, Jack?"

 

"Not exactly. Well, technically maybe. Fun fact, you can beam up a hostile with the emergency transporter and beam them back down to a nearby island surrounded by this world's version of sharks in one point six seconds. If you're good with the controls. I grabbed a couple pilots and we got them all rounded up in about two hours so we could come down and get you."

 

"It was kind of genius, Captain."

 

"Mura do not imprint on this reprobate."

 

"Yes, ma'am."

 

"Captain? Did I do wrong? I checked the regs. There wasn't one that said we couldn't."

 

"Then we're fine. Thank you, Jack. Thank you, all of you."

 

"Can I go down to sickbay? Check on Liam?"

 

"Oh my God, he's my boyfriend, Crusher. Not yours. And yes, you can go down to sickbay. Make sure Raffi's gotten checked out while you're down there—she's cagey at avoiding docs."

 

"On it."

 

"Do not smile like that when you do it. No matter how satisfying it will be to get to tell her what to do."

 

"Roger that. And I'll bring back snacks."

 

"La Forge—you're a saint for putting up with him."

 

"Don't I know it, Captain Seven."

 

 

11.

 

Seven was sitting laughing with Raffi and Jack when Ohk walked off the lift. "Doctor."

 

"Captain. Can I have a minute of your time?"

 

"Sure." She got up and led her to the ready room, shutting the door after her. "Is it Liam?"

 

"No. It's you and me."

 

Seven pointed to the chairs at the table but Ohk said, "I'd rather stand, ma'am, if it's all the same to you."

 

Seven almost said it wasn't. This woman had never been friendly to her.

 

Then again she'd never seen her be friendly to anyone really. Not even Liam. She was the exception that proved the rule that Trill were usually fun to be around.

 

"Well, I'll sit." She sat at the table, not behind her desk. It left her more open, and sitting while Ohk was standing was a cessation of power—of perceived power at any rate. She didn't think either of them was under any illusions who was really in charge. But still, she'd give her this.

 

"Do you have someone you want in my place?" Ohk asked.

 

"No."

 

"Not Jack Crusher?"

 

"He's not a doctor, is he?" Her sincere confusion on that seemed to soften Ohk and she sat down across from her.

 

"I don't actually know. But he ran into sickbay yesterday, grabbing emergency items for a case I wasn't even consulted on. He was in later hounding Raffi when I'd already checked her out and cleared her. Do you not trust me or do chains of command actually not exist for you? Because in the case of injuries, that could get someone killed."

 

Seven met her eyes, trying to read what was at the core of this. Ohk and the Crushers had never hit it off. But she tried to imagine what the Doctor would have done if Tom Paris had started to act independently rather than being an aide.

 

He would have stood for it exactly as long as Ohk was doing.

 

She slowly let out breath. "I've given him wide latitude. It never occurred to me that he wouldn't at least tell you what was going on. But to be honest, it didn't occur to me that he should either. You and I—we don't really have a relationship."

 

"No, we don't."

 

"Did you have one with Liam?"

 

"We had mapped out how to work together."

 

She smiled. "I used to love stellar cartography. Mapping things out takes time. How long did it take you and he to work things out?"

 

Ohk smiled slightly. "A while."

 

"I was very close to the Doctor on Voyager. He had us all trained. Put up with no shit. But he also...was a bit more present than you are. I never see you in the lounge or Ten Forward."

 

"I wasn't aware partying was a requirement of my job."

 

"How can you determine what is normal for this crew if you never see them off duty?" She held her hand up before Ohk could speak. "Kathryn Janeway asked me that. When I was first separated from the collective and avoided social gatherings. She was right."

 

"And how did Kathryn Janeway treat your Doctor? He was a hologram she could turn off when finished with. How convenient."

 

Seven sat back, unsure how to answer that. "Do you trust me as captain?"

 

"No."

 

She knew her eyebrow was rivaling Tuvok's. "I see."

 

"Do you trust me as your CMO?"

 

"I'm unsure. Your bedside manner is lacking. Your skill however may not be."

 

"May not be? I can't work for a captain who thinks I may not be up to the task."

 

Seven stood, tired of this. "Then put in for a transfer, Doctor Ohk. I'll happily approve it."

 

Ohk didn't get up. Then she pulled out her padd and scrolled until she found something. She handed it to Seven. "You may be the only one who understands why this matters."

 

She read: We regret to inform you that you were not deemed a sufficient match to recall to Trill for further assessment for the Tass symbiont. We also note that your age of eligibility comes to an end this month. Since that is the case, you will no longer be considered for joining. Thank you for your interest in being joined. We wish you all the best with your Starfleet career.

 

Seven handed back the padd, unsure what to say.

 

"All my life, I've felt incomplete. Insufficient. I've longed to be joined and it had nothing to do with the status. And every time, I'm not the right candidate."

 

"I'm sorry." She sat down, next to her this time.

 

"What was it like to be part of the Borg? I was too old to be assimilated too." She laughed, a bitter sound.

 

"It's not what you think. It's not a partnership the way I understand the Trill symbiont experience is. You're taken over, your will suppressed, your body changed—all against your will. I didn't realize you were interested in being joined."

 

"I never told anyone in Starfleet. Not even Liam. I mean how many rejections do you want to share?" She exhaled loudly, as if she was letting go of more than just air. "I've just been so unhappy for so long. And the more unhappy I get the more I go inside myself."

 

"Believe me. I understand that." She saw Ohk scoff. "I was a Ranger. And I was on a hunt for the woman who killed my son. And then I found her and I killed her and going back to being a Ranger sounded...horrible. And lonely. So after I killed her, I just walked into a swarm of guards, not even taking cover, fully expecting to die. But I didn't. I killed a bunch and the rest ran. And there I was, staring at a future I wasn't sure I even wanted."

 

Ohk nodded. "I only joined Starfleet because the Symbiosis Council looks favorably on candidates who are able to work with other species, who have a sense of mission, of shared purpose. But...I'm not sure I have those. I just wanted to be joined."

 

"How can I help you?" Seven realized she meant it. She saw a kindred spirit in Ohk, saw the individual behind the uniform and the ever present stern countenance.

 

"I don't know. The counselor Starfleet would send me to is Ezri Dax. She never wanted the symbiont—but now seems to thrive. I doubt we'd mesh. I was thinking about Troi."

 

The woman who couldn't stay in the room when confronted with the Borg inside Jack? Seven would take Ezri over her, but she knew Ohk was unlikely to unravel anything so personally frightening for Troi. "From what I understand, she does remote counseling."

 

"Will I be here or back at Command?"

 

"That's up to you. You put in the request to leave and I'll approve it. You don't and I'll try to remember that Jack does what I ask with a maximum of energy and at times a minimum of coordination."

 

Ohk laughed softly. "He does jump for you. If you weren't with Liam and he weren't with Sidney, I'd wonder..."

 

"We have shared histories, not feelings." She smiled gently. "Perhaps not unlike you and I do."

 

Ohk nodded. "I'm sorry I said I didn't trust you."

 

"Don't be. You were honest. And I'll either earn your trust or I won't."

 

"And I'll either earn yours or I won't?"

 

Seven nodded. "If we keep being honest, that's a good first step."

 

"Aye aye, Captain." Her tone was light years away from where it had been.

 

It was a start.

 

##

 

Shaw was in his quarters after shift. His knee felt good as new and he'd searched out Damato to make sure he hadn't said anything too stupid. Damato was a new transfer since he'd stepped down, one of Seven's first picks. A good guy who'd been quick to assure him he hadn't said anything that wasn't completely adorable, if a little sappy.

 

Captain Shaw wouldn't have been thrilled being categorized as sappy. Engineer Shaw could live with it. Especially when the object of his sappiness was palming her way into his quarters.

 

"Your knee is fully healed?"

 

He grinned. "Nice to see you too, Babe."

 

"Answer the question, Mister Shaw."

 

"Yes, it's fine."

 

"I could have lost you yesterday. I understand your love of firsts and there will be many for us in the future. But going around the bases this slowly will not be one of them. You are on first, the next hitter has the best home run average on the team. Get ready to run the bases, Captain Shaw."

 

"You like baseball?"

 

"I detest it. But I played on one of the Ranger softball teams because—stop changing the subject."

 

He laughed and pulled her to him. "So you're saying waiting is not on your list of things to do?"

 

"I am saying that. There are three bases waiting and your player just hit. It. Out. Of. The. Park." With each word she stepped her fingers down his chest to his groin.

 

"Then I best get to second base."

 

"Unless you truly do not want to. I believe in consent."

 

"I'm game." He grinned when she held her arms up so he could pull her uniform top off her.

 

Her bra was regulation; her breasts were not. Holy shit but these had been the object of so many fantasies. He eased the bra off her and pulled her back so he could sit on the bed and pull her to him.

 

So he could suck and bite gently and lick and learn this previously unknown area of the woman he loved.

 

She was moaning, and leaning on him harder, and reached down, pulling off his shirt and then straddling him, their chests pressed together skin to skin as they kissed. "I want you inside me, Liam."

 

"How long has it been since you've been with a guy?"

 

"A while."

 

"There's a reason the bases are in the order they're in." He eased her off him, then began to pull her pants off, then her underwear. He let her pull his off, then moved up the bed, and drew her up next to him. "Lie back."

 

"I want you inside me now."

 

"I'll be inside you. Just not the way you want." He smiled in what he knew was a controlling way as he eased his finger into her, finding her very wet and so ready for him. He added another finger, used his thumb on her clit and she began to writhe and moan. "Someone thought she was captain of our baseball team. Could tell her star player how to run the bases. Does she want me to quit what I'm doing and follow her instructions?"

 

"Fuck you, Liam." She was clutching the comforter.

 

"I'll take that as a no." He kept going, adding another finger, making sure he wouldn't hurt her once he was inside her, and she was gone, calling out loudly, telling him she loved him, and he kept his fingers inside her as she came down, moving them slowly, gently, waiting for her to be less sensitive, to go again.

 

Even though he wanted her to touch him more than he could say.

 

"My turn," she said, easing his fingers out of her, kissing each one, then moving to him, kissing down his belly to—oh, holy shit, yes.

 

Her mouth. Her mouth was everything at this moment. Nothing else existed until she wrapped her hand around him and squeezed just right, and then there was that too. He tried to tell her it was too good, too much, but she did the sign language he'd taught her meant to shut up on an away mission, and he laughed as she took him over the edge and dropped him so, so, so far then caught him before he crashed.

 

"Breathe, Liam."

 

He pulled her to him, kissing her, wanting to taste himself on her the way she'd tasted herself on him.

 

Then she got a very mischievous grin, pulled away, and said, "You know you're right. No home plate tonight. We'll take it excruciatingly slowly and—"

 

She had to shut up because he yanked her back to him, kissing her more aggressively than he ever had before, feeling her respond in kind.

 

"So someone's going to get his run batted in?" she asked.

 

"I prefer to think of it as a home run."

 

"You prefer to think of it in the wrong terminology, but whatever." She laughed as he nipped her lip. "I like this. A little rough."

 

"So do I."

 

"I'll say when it's too much if you will."

 

"Deal." He pushed her back, kissed down her thigh and then found his way back inside her with his fingers, only he used his mouth this time too.

 

"You don't forget what you were doing."

 

He stopped what he was doing to meet her eyes. "I'm an engineer, Seven. Things come up but then you go back to what you were doing."

 

She laughed at his silly double entendre. "I like it when things come up."

 

"Yeah. Well, they'll be up again soon. Doing this, to you, after what you just did to me. Five million fantasies are coming true."

 

"Same here." But then she had to shut up because he'd gone back to what he was doing and she was taking the climb again and then was going, calling out his name in just the best way.

 

"I don't think you're supposed to tap third twice," she said as she curled into him.

 

"If the catcher had the ball and I'd already left the base, I could run back and hope to outrun the throw."

 

"What if you couldn't outrun it?"

 

"I'd slide."

 

She rolled him to his back and with an extraordinarily sensual grin said, "That's enough sports talk. I think I'd like to ride you, if that's all right?" She was fondling him into full life as she looked at him.

 

"Be my guest, my love."

 

Her smile was so beautiful. "My love. You are my love."

 

"I know. I'm super happy about that."

 

"Yes, but perhaps more because I'm about to envelope your penis."

 

"That doesn't hurt, but it wouldn't make me love you if I didn't already." God knew he'd tried enough women trying to get this one out of his heart and mind.

 

She laughed and eased aboard. "Oh, fuck me," he said as she took her time sliding down, doing that enveloping he'd fantasized about for far too long.

 

"I am. Fucking you. Fucking Captain Liam Shaw." She leaned down, kissed him tenderly. "I've wanted to do this for so, so, so long."

 

"We were morons, Seven."

 

"Yeah," she sort of moaned, sort of said, as she slid down all the way, and closed her eyes, her smile the most satisfied he'd ever seen her wear. "Yeah, we really were."

 

##

 

"This seat taken, Raff?"

 

"Oh, I know that look, Seven. Good night?"

 

"Should I tell you these things?"

 

"Well, I don't need details. But I guess the taking it slow is done?"

 

"Uh huh."

 

"And it was nice?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"I'm really happy for you."

 

"Thank you."

 

"So while you were busy doing the nasty with your man friend, I was in Ten Forward, being present and all."

 

"Rub it in. Go ahead."

 

"Sorry. I'll only do it for the next few weeks. Anyway, Ohk came in. Sat with me. Had a drink. Actually cracked a smile."

 

"For real?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"And...?"

 

"And she was really nice. I don't mean like she was trying to be. We just got to talking and she's really nice."

 

"That's great. Wait, do you mean nice like pursuable?"

 

"I didn't get that vibe from her. But nice as in I wouldn't mind having another drink with her. She said something changed in her life but didn't give details. Whatever it was, I like this side of her."

 

"The team's coming together."

 

"It really is. Although I can't see her singing to Liam."

 

"I didn't expect everyone to join in. But it was amazing."

 

"I like that you're the kind of captain that lets people join in. No taking your old friends into the ready room and locking the rest of us out."

 

"That really did suck."

 

"It really goddamned did."

 

 

12.

 

Shaw heard Jack's footsteps and what he thought was the quiet sound of a stasis cart. But not headed toward his office, more toward the inventory cabinets, so he walked out quietly and followed Jack into the space where all the spare parts and supplies were kept.

 

Jack started taking things out of a cabinet as Shaw leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. When Jack turned to push the cart to the next cabinet, he jumped. "Jesus, you're quiet."

 

"What are you doing?"

 

"Well, it's come to my attention that I can't just run into places during an emergency and take what I need without coordinating with every fucking person."

 

"You're better without swearing."

 

"For real?"

 

"Yeah. Go on."

 

"Anyway, so yeah, it slows me down when lives or materiel is on the line."

 

Materiel. A military term Jack had to have learned from the multitude of regulations that termed it that way. Shaw felt so proud.

 

"I can see that."

 

"So I'm making grab-and-go bags. I've got a small closet no one was using to store them in. There will be some for hot weather, some for cold, some for common engineering issues, medical, scientific scanning—I haven't worked out yet what combos are going to make the most sense."

 

"It's a great idea."

 

Jack beamed then turned back to the cabinets.

 

"Not so fast, Ensign."

 

He turned quickly, frustration on his face. "We did inventory together." His face momentarily cleared, no doubt at the memory of finally getting one over on Shaw when it came to regulations. "You told me it's automated so no person has to log in everything they used. Pull it out of the cabinet, it pings the quartermaster's database. Pull enough out, and they order you more."

 

"You must have been daydreaming during the second part of that lesson. Use it on the ship and it gets logged in as used and won't get logged again until the recycler sends the notice to the quartermaster. But if you're just going to throw them in your bags, they're in the wind. And you know what happens then?"

 

Jack sighed. "You get notifications?'

 

"Endless fucking notifications. For all the quartermaster knows, whoever took them is selling that shit on the black market. And with your record...?"

 

Jack looked utterly defeated. "Well, at least I started here and don't have to put everything back."

 

"I didn't say you had to put everything back. I think this is a really fucking good idea. But you need to figure out how to make this not a pain for all the department heads who will have checked-out material that isn't being utilized. Take the stuff. But only from here. Then go meet with the quartermaster and see how you can modify the database and the closet you're using to account for your bags and automatically log them in as on hold."

 

"I could have the captain do it."

 

"You could." But it wouldn't get him far—Seven and the Quartermaster's relationship was still a work in progress. "But I heartily recommend forging your own alliance with him. He enjoys a nice fifteen-year-old single malt—grease the skids, make the first meeting more pleasant. Schedule it for shift change so you're both technically off duty."

 

Jack grinned. "I have a Bowmore...?"

 

"In your personal stash? Because that can come back to haunt you, giving personal gifts to higher-ranked people not recognized as in your personal circle. If he'd even take it..."

 

"But I can't use official funds to purchase booze to make my job easier."

 

"You aren't wrong. So long as you drink the Bowmore from your private stash with him, off duty, it's fine. And you can conveniently leave the bottle with him when you're done drinking. Knowing him, he'll mark it as for you and him and only serve it when you're there."

 

"Do you know what'll help grease the skids with Ohk? She loathes me."

 

"She's a tough one." But he let one side of his mouth go up.

 

"Come on. I can tell you know."

 

"She got addicted to maple candy when she was at the Academy. The small batch kind, from an artisanal shop."

 

"You mean like in New England or Canada?"

 

He nodded, keeping his face face still, no hints this time.

 

"But my mother drove her nuts. I was sort of...collateral annoyance. And I've made her crazy since." He met Shaw's eyes. "I'm not sure it's in my nature to apologize to her."

 

"You mean with words?" At Jack's nod, he said, "Then candy would be a lie too. Maybe with her you just have to do the work to build the relationship. Not every relationship has skids that can be greased."

 

"My experience is that most do."

 

"Your experience wasn't with Starfleet, right? Kind of the opposite?"

 

Jack nodded. "Do the work? Who has that kind of time?"

 

"You do."

 

"Fine." He patted the cart. "But I can keep going here?"

 

"Provided you make sure the quartermaster immediately orders anything you take that ends up under the minimum required number to have in stock. In the wind means no ping goes to him to reorder, and I'm not rushing down to your special closet in an emergency. I want my shit close at hand."

 

"Got it. So should I even take it then?"

 

"Technically no. But Quartermaster E'lia'h doesn't deal well with hypotheticals. You tell him you're going to do it, he'll want to wait to create a solution until you've done it. You present him with a large enough piece of weird with his inventory, however, and he'll work with you to find the solution. But I want access to your fucking closet in the meantime."

 

"How do I know you won't sell them on the black market and blame me?"

 

He gave Jack a very long, very disappointed sigh.

 

"Yeah, that was a stupid question. Sorry, Reg Master Shaw."

 

##

 

Seven was just finishing shift when she heard the back door to the ready room open. She'd never taken away Liam's access and didn't intend to. Raffi also had access as did Ohk.

 

She'd learned on Voyager not to make any location a single point of failure—or access—because weird shit could and did happen.

 

But Liam was the only one who came in the back way.

 

Smiling, she hit her combadge. "Seven to Raffi. I'm out of here. Sticking you with shift change. Sorry."

 

"I know why. Go enjoy the rush of new love."

 

"Roger that." She didn't turn around, waited for Liam to reach around her, to kiss her neck, and she wasn't disappointed. A little shiver went down her spine as he kissed her.

 

"Want to make a fantasy come true for me?"

 

"We are not fucking in here."

 

He laughed. "Wow, you sounded captainly. Nice job. No, it's not that." He eased her out of the chair and sat down. "Pretend you're coming in to tell me something. You're super annoyed at me."

 

"So like a normal day back then?" She grinned at his bark of laughter. "Fine, let me get into character." She walked back toward the main door, trying to remember how aggravated she used to get with him. Turning on her heel, she stomped toward him. "Sir, we have a problem."

 

"Is the ship going to blow up?"

 

"No."

 

"Is anyone going to die?"

 

"Me, perhaps, of high blood pressure. I'm telling you—"

 

"I know. Come here."

 

"Sir?"

 

"If we have a problem, perhaps I can fix it. Seven."

 

It was strange how good it felt to hear him call her that. Even though he did all the time now and she was just pretending. Interesting how easy it was to get back to this, to how she used to be on guard with him.

 

She walked around to his side of the desk. "Sir?"

 

"I have found that we relate best when we're working together, especially in engineering, in very close quarters."

 

"Perhaps there is only enough oxygen to work, not fight."

 

He smiled. "Or..."

 

She rolled her eyes. His endless, weirdly chipper "or" moments used to drive her nuts. "Or...?"

 

"Or proximity is our friend." He held out his hand. "Are you willing to test that theory. See if we work better together when we're close?"

 

"Highly irregular, sir."

 

"Have we ever been regular, Hansen?"

 

The old name threw her a little. "No."

 

"No." He began to draw back his hand.

 

She hurried to take it, let him pull her closer to him, felt the tension that was often between them change to something more elemental. She swallowed hard, and he watched her do it with a satisfied grin. "Perhaps I am simply too uncomfortable with this treatment to form a decent insult."

 

"You are never incapable of forming a decent insult." He laughed at her expression—and grudging acceptance. "Should we try closer? Or are you actually uncomfortable with this? Because if it's bringing up old shit for you, Sev, I don't need to keep going."

 

She realized he'd broken out of whatever kind of fantasy this was. Was taking care of her in the best way. "The old me would have been overwhelmed. The new me is enjoying this—but..."

 

"It's like we're back there." He nodded. "Way too easy to slip back into calling you Hansen."

 

"Do what you want to do, Liam."

 

He pulled her onto his lap, wrapping his arms around her. "What if I'd done this. What if I'd looked at you like this?" His eyes were incredibly soft. "What if I'd touched your face like this?" He ran his finger over her brow implant, then did it again, this time more like an engineer than anything else.

 

She could feel it—herself finally settling down with him, finally feeling like all of her was okay, not just the part of her that he liked to fix things with.

 

"I'd do this," she whispered, running her fingers down his beard, then over his cheekbones, then to his lips, tracing them.

 

He looked lost. "And then I'd lose my position for doing this if you decided to report me—or I reported myself out of guilt." He pulled her to him, his lips soft on hers, the old emotions tugging at her while she felt anchored by the affection and respect they had now. It was the strangest combination of feelings.

 

She opened her mouth to him and he moaned and pulled her closer, his hands everywhere, but he stayed on top of her clothing, doing nothing too egregious.

 

"What if I'd told you I loved you? That I had from almost the beginning. That I was being an asshole so I could hide what I felt from you—because I was sure you'd run the other way. Who would fucking want me?"

 

"I'd have told you I loved you back. That I had for so long."

 

He crushed her to him and she was about to rethink her "no sex in the ready room" position when she heard the main door open and Raffi say, "Oh for God's sake, you two. You have quarters. Use them."

 

Liam was laughing hard as he muttered, "Busted." Then leaned away from her and said, "Hi, Raffi."

 

"Yeah, hi yourself, dipshit. What if I'd brought the beta shift 'captain' in here to look at the table instead of just coming in here to copy what I wanted to my padd?"

 

"Then we'd have had an audience of two instead of one." She smiled at Raffi. "Math is fun."

 

Raffi pointed at Liam. "If you can get up without embarrassing me, take our captain somewhere private."

 

"Can I have a minute on that?"

 

"Oh, fuck you both." She went to the table, copied what she needed, and walked out, closing the door behind her.

 

He laughed and rested his head against her chest. "I guess that's why no fucking in the ready room?"

 

"Among other reasons." She went back to kissing him. If Raffi came back in without asking the computer for her location, that was on her. And the beta and gamma shift bridge leads didn't have access to the room.

 

When she and Liam finally eased apart, she said, "Before she came in, that felt really..."

 

"I know. Like the past was colliding with the present."

 

She nodded. "It felt good, but weird. Or maybe weird, but good." She held his face with a hand on either side of his head. "Not sure I'd want to do that very often. The darkness..."

 

He nodded. "Yeah, I like this version of us better." He stroked her hair. "But I really love that you let me do it, that you took the journey with me."

 

"I'd go anywhere with you."

 

He scoffed. "History says otherwise."

 

"Or I'd tell you no but make it clear why. I did learn some things during our time with Picard. You're my person, Liam. You're my way. No matter what."

 

He nodded. "And you're mine. You want to eat?"

 

"Can we ravish each other first?"

 

"I was hoping you'd say that."

 

##

 

"Hey, nice to see you back in here."

 

"Nice to see a friendly face, Raffi."

 

"Do you have another name, Ohk? Or is it like Spock famously used to tell humans—we couldn't pronounce it."

 

"I do. I don't use it. Ohk is actually my first name. I..."

 

"Hey, you don't have to tell me whatever you were going to if it upsets you."

 

"No, it's okay. I didn't use my other name because I was hoping it would eventually be Dax or Tass or some other symbiont's name. That was all I ever wanted: to be joined. But...I've aged out of the program, so I really should think about adding my last name to the database."

 

"Only everyone's used to calling you just Ohk now. So I think you should leave it until you're really sure."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Yeah. Sometimes, when one thing ends and you're starting out on a new road, you think you should make all kinds of changes, but they can be counterproductive. Can overwhelm and make everything unfamiliar. Stick to one change and then go from there."

 

"That's wise counsel. And I respect how you came to know and give it."

 

"Thanks. For what it's worth, I'm really sorry you weren't selected."

 

"Yeah. So am I. But now, I feel like I just sort of treaded water for years. Waiting for the experience that was going to change my life. And it never came and now here I am. Just me. A person my colleagues either don't know or don't like or both."

 

"I'm getting to know you. And like you. That's one of us. The rest will follow—or not. Not everyone needs to know or like you."

 

"True. To new friends?"

 

"I'm drinking water tonight. Water toasts are bad luck."

 

"For real? Water's so healthy."

 

"I don't make the rules."

 

"Can we get a ginger ale over here? Thank you, Ensign. Okay, better?"

 

"Better. To new friends."

 

"Cheers."

 

 

 

 

13.

 

Shaw was at his desk, finishing up some reports while Seven was in meetings. The ship would be at spacedock for a week. So much time for the two of them to have first after first.

 

Taking her to meet his family was the first-first.

 

He heard footsteps, they didn't sound familiar, but then an ensign he realized he hadn't seen around lately peeked in. "Sir?"

 

He racked his brain for the kid's name. He'd barely been on his ship a month when the Borg thing happened. Roberts? No, Richards. "Ensign Richards. Where've you been hiding?"

 

"At Starfleet Medical, sir. Psychiatric hold."

 

"Oh." Shit, this was the one who'd shot him? He hadn't even realized he was off the ship. But he'd been in life sciences, in an area Shaw rarely interacted with.

 

"Sir, if this is not a good time, or if it's never going to be a good time...?"

 

He stood and walked toward him, saying, "Belay that, Ensign. I'm your first captain." And they'd shared so fucking much in the letters back and forth, letters that had become less frequent but were still being exchanged. "I feel like a hug's in order."

 

Richards grinned. "I'd really like that, sir." He went into Shaw's open arms easily, holding him tightly and Shaw pretended not to notice he was crying. "Your letters meant everything."

 

"And I meant everything in them. Are you coming back to the ship?"

 

He eased away and shook his head. "Captain Seven has me working on Captain Kim's ship. We thought it best—my shrinks too. A new start. No memories even if all the junior officers on that ship have the same experience. Except the killing their captain part."

 

"On the Pandora, three officers were shot by the same person. That person never came forward and it was in an area where cameras had been disabled. You came forward. You did the right thing. Even before you knew I was alive. That's what you hang onto. That you're a good man. The one who shot me—that was Borg. That wasn't you."

 

Richards nodded. "I need to get back to my ship. But I saw the Enterprise was here too and I had to run over."

 

"I appreciate that. And I'm here, if you need to write. Or comm—since I know it's you now."

 

"Sometimes it's easier to write it down. But I appreciate having multiple avenues to talk to you. I'm really glad you're alive, sir." And with a last smile, he hurried off.

 

A few moments later Raffi walked in. "I hope that ensign was running for a good reason and not because he was terrified."

 

He laughed. "Yeah, all good."

 

She was wandering around his not terribly large office, looking at all his weird collection of shit, and he finally said, "What's on your mind, Raffi?"

 

"Seven is so nervous."

 

"About meeting my family?"

 

She nodded.

 

"As in too nervous to do it? Is it too soon? Or does she not want to ever?" He felt really off balance.

 

Raffi pushed him into his chair. "Jesus, Liam, breathe. No. I'm just warning you. When she's nervous she can freeze up a little." Her face changed and she looked away.

 

"What?"

 

"I know she told you about our wacky hijinks in the twenty-first century. How she didn't have implants?"

 

He nodded.

 

"She was a different person when it came to being around people socially. Strangers, I mean. She's does great with the crew, with friends. But it was...she was great with them."

 

He thought there was something unsaid there but that was between her and Seven.

 

"So, when she freezes up, don't react, don't pull away, don't do any of the things I did. Just be you, and keep her with you the way only you seem to be able to do. She wants to belong with you. And her parents were shitty. I'd really like her to have some decent ones even if they're yours."

 

He smiled gently at her. "You're such a good person, Raffi."

 

"I haven't always been. Just making up for lost time."

 

##

 

Seven sat with Kathryn and B'Elanna in the officer's club while their men were playing darts. To the death from the look of it.

 

"So how were his parents?" B'Elanna had the most self-satisfied look imaginable.

 

"Do they swear as much as he does?" Kathryn asked with an amused glint in her eye.

 

"They were wonderful. And they do not." She knew her own expression was happy—possibly happier than she'd ever consistently been. "But they laughed when he swears so they may have just been behaving for company."

 

She smiled to herself. She'd been so afraid of how they'd react to her implants. Especially after what Liam had gone through during Wolf 359. But they hadn't even seemed to notice them. His father had pulled her in for a big hug and called her "Sweetheart." His mother had just looked on with such a peaceful expression, like somehow Seven was making everything better just by being with her son.

 

It had been easy and lovely and then cousins and aunts and uncles had shown up. Normally she'd have been overwhelmed but not this time. They were just all so welcoming.

 

"Liam's mother wants him married." B'Elanna laughed at her expression. "To you. Not just anybody. She called it before any of us did that her baby boy was in wuv."

 

"Oh, stop."

 

"No, she did. We were at his place for a summer barbecue and she took me aside and asked me all about you."

 

"Good thing she asked you now and not when Seven first came aboard Voyager," Kathryn said, her grin wry.

 

"That would for sure have been a different answer."

 

Seven heard Liam's footsteps, then he leaned down and kissed her cheek. "Who won?"

 

"Not me. Your ex plays like our lives were on the line. He and Tom are still going at it but I tapped out to be with the much better company at this table."

 

"If you want it to stay better, quit referring to my husband as her ex." Kathryn's look was stern.

 

"Whatever, Katie."

 

She and B'Elanna froze—did he just call Janeway that?

 

But then Kathryn broke out into laughter. "This one has balls, Seven. I approve." Then she leaned in, took Liam's face between her hands, and said, "Call me that again, though, and you'll find out what a courtmartial's like."

 

"We're at a social gathering."

 

"In the O Club."

 

"Socially. Show me the reg, Admiral."

 

"If Crusher were here, he might be able to." Seven laughed as she reached over and pried Kathryn's hands off Liam's cheeks. "He's sorry for calling you Katie."

 

"No, I'm not," Liam said at the same time as B'Elanna said, "No, he's not."

 

"She was telling us about the family reunion." Kathryn winked at him.

 

B'Elanna shook her head. "Barely. Barely telling us."

 

He grinned like a fool. "They loved her. More than they love me, I think." He went to another table and pulled a chair over to sit next to Seven. "My girlfriend wowed them. And they can be a lot. I mean a lot."

 

"They were sweet." She smiled as he put his arm around her, the casual way he did it, not territorial, not trying too hard. Just him.

 

"So are you going to make an honest man of him, Seven?" Kathryn laughed as they all sputtered their drinks. "What? Marriage is nice. I like it. You like it, B'Elanna. Why shouldn't they?"

 

"We've got a lot of firsts to do before then." He glanced at her, and his look was easy, like they'd answer that question when they came to it. Like he wasn't opposed but wasn't going to rush into it.

 

Everyone she'd ever loved had rushed into things. It was glorious to finally be with someone who knew how to enjoy the moment.

 

##

 

"You okay? Big weekend. My family, then yours."

 

"Well, B'Elanna and Tom are yours too."

 

"True."

 

"Lovely weekend. Because I was with you."

 

"I loved having you with me."

 

"I was super nervous about meeting your family."

 

"Yeah? I think that passed fast though. You seemed...happy."

 

"I was. I never got to know my extended family."

 

"You know you could, right? They're out there probably. Cousins, maybe. Is that something you want?"

 

"I don't think so. Can I just have yours?"

 

"Sure. Anything you want."

 

"And you. I guess that goes without saying?"

 

"I don't know. Pretty sure my father would adopt you if you want to dump me. Mom for sure would."

 

"Bullshit. She loves you so much. She'd do anything for you."

 

"I don't love that look."

 

"Just thinking about my own parents. They sucked, Liam. They really, really did."

 

"I know they did. I'm sorry. So, should we talk about Kathryn's marriage comment? I played it off but I'm light years from opposed."

 

"Me too. Just..."

 

"Not yet. I know. All those firsts."

 

"And they'll give us shit about serving together. This is not the Delta Quadrant."

 

"That it is not. Thank God. But eventually...?"

 

"If you play your cards right. Keep me happy. Make me laugh."

 

"Argue with you?"

 

"That's a given, Liam."

 

"Yep, it sure is."

 

FIN