DISCLAIMER: The Star Trek characters
are the property of Paramount Studios, Inc and Viacom. The story contents are the
creation and property of Djinn and are copyright (c) 2022 by Djinn. This story
is Rated R.
It's in the Spaces Between That We Fall in
Love
by Djinn
Part 4: How We Came Together
He feels the joy of seeing
his captain alive, the relief that he did not kill him, that T'Pring's plan had
not worked.
And that he is free. Finally
free.
He looks for Christine but
McCoy has chased her out. He knows why even if he does not think Christine is
with him any longer.
If she was ever with
him. Spock understands that there is love and then there is solace, and that
might have been what she and McCoy provided each other.
It does not matter to him
now. He is free and so is she and what he did not take during the burning, he
will ask for now.
"I believe I have a
nurse to apologize to," he says, and Jim smiles in a knowing way.
McCoy though does not look
happy. "I'm sure she'll live without one."
"I, however, might
not." He does not move, fixes McCoy with a look that he knows is too
aggressive, but the hormones from the burning still run through his veins. Even
if they no longer require him to mate or die—or kill those who dared touch the
woman that is his.
Stonn can have T'Pring. He cares
not. But this man took Christine and that does matter.
He realizes his hands are
clenched and says, "Perhaps I am not fully over the burning. I will
meditate." And he leaves Jim and McCoy, and finds Christine at her desk.
"Come with me."
She does not ask why, does
not tell McCoy she is leaving, just takes the hand he has held out for her and
lets him pull her up.
They walk very fast to the
lift, even faster to his quarters. Once the door closes, he asks, "Do you
understand what has happened?"
"No. Len kicked me out,
remember?"
"Because he knows you
are mine."
Her surprise is immediate.
Before she can debate him, he says, "T'Pring challenged. It was most
unexpected."
"I don't understand,
Spock." She is backing away from him and that is the wrong direction.
"In the end, she did not
want me. Only wanted to humiliate me and make me suffer when my friend lay dead
at my hands." He moves closer. "But my friend is not dead and I am
now free of her. Free, Christine." He touches her face. "Do you
understand now?"
She nods but pulls a scanner
out from her pocket. "I just want to see how much you're under the
influence of your hormones."
"Please do." He
lets her take the readings. "Moderate at best."
She nods.
"I want you."
She puts the scanner back into
her pocket and moves toward him. "I want you too."
And then she is in his arms,
as she was that day on the bridge, only there is no one to fool. There is only
this desire and love.
She pushes him against the wall
and he hikes her up and turns, kissing everywhere he has ever wanted to,
touching, stroking, slowly taking her clothes off as she does the same for him.
He does not want to rush
this. "Where shall our first time be? Here against this wall or in my bed?"
She nips his lip with her
teeth. "You choose. I just want you inside me."
"I value how direct you
are."
She reaches down, squeezing,
and he closes his eyes. "I value how hard you are." She laughs as he
allows himself to smile. Then she lets go of him, stroking his face as she
kisses him, and they go nowhere for a long time, leaning against the wall,
kissing the way he has always wanted to.
So free. So united. The
passion he feels for her telling him to carry her to his bed and take her but
the love he has for her telling him not to rush. To savor. To find out how
delicious this will be.
Finally she pulls away and says, "Your bed. Now."
He carries her, experiencing
her laughter as both sound and emotion, the sweetest thing is this joy that has
erupted between them. "I love you," he says.
"I love you too."
And then she is pulling him down, and into her, and nothing he has known is
like this. He feels utterly whole with her, trusts her completely. Whatever she
wants in bed he will do. Whatever he wants, he will ask for, knowing she will
not be offended even if it is something she does not want to do.
He has never felt so free.
They lie together afterwards,
gently caressing, giving soft fluttering kisses.
Until "McCoy to
Spock" sounds from his communicator.
"Spock here."
"I can't find
Chapel."
He feels her tense, feels her
fear, and realizes she thinks he will make her hide this as before. "She is
here, Doctor. She accepted my apology. I do not think you will see her the rest
of the night."
Her smile is a mixture of
happiness and compassion. He has probably wounded her ex-lover with his words,
and she is kind. But she is also his. And he does not care if he causes some
pain while telling this man that he has, finally, claimed the woman he wants.
"I see. Well, tell her
I'll see her tomorrow then." There is nothing in his voice that sound
overly sad, but McCoy is a master of hiding his own feelings even as he urges
Spock to show his. "McCoy out."
She studies him. "You
enjoyed that."
"I did. He had
you." He can feel the wash of emotions from her. "You enjoyed it, as
well. A part of you did."
"You're not wrong."
"I will not hide
this."
"Okay, umm, you should
know that I've applied for medical school. I'm taking the courses I can
virtually from here. But..."
"But you are going
away?" He fights back a feeling of panic—he cannot lose her. Not now.
"Not for a year at
least. And it won't be long. I'm trying to test out of a lot of it and do some
of it practically under Len."
"Have I just undermined
his willingness to do that—"
"No. No, it's not that.
I just—I just wanted you to know. And I'm not sure how Starfleet Medical will
feel about me dating the first officer, you know?" She buries her face in
his chest. "I can't believe I'm saying this but can we be discreet? Not
hiding it, but not flaunting it either?"
He feels a bit off balance.
"How is discreet different than hiding it?"
She cuddles in next to him
and does not seem upset at the question. "Well, no dancing." She
laughs at his look. "And no PDA."
"PDA?"
"Public displays of
affection."
He remembers kissing T'Pring
the night she asked him to marry her, remembers the man in the restaurant
asking them to not do that in public. "You are as strict as a
Vulcan."
"But it's
okay?" She runs her hand through his hair and he closes his eyes at the
sensation. "We can spend time in our quarters and outside them. But the
sexy parts happen here." Then she begins to grin. "Or a lab if you
reserve it for us. Or a supply closet. Or..."
"I am beginning to feel
less restricted." He pulls her on top of him. "Answer me this: are
you mine?"
"I am. Are you
mine?"
"I am."
Her smile is beautiful, as
lovely as he's ever seen. "Then we're good."
"Yes," he says as
he rolls her to her back and begins to kiss down her body. "Yes, we
are."
##
He wakes to her stretched
along the length of him. It has been a week. A week where he has enjoyed her
company discreetly in public, which has proven to probably be no different than
how he would act if given no such limitation, and enjoyed her fully in private.
He also apologized to McCoy,
blaming the hormones of the Pon Farr for his
aggressive lack of tact.
McCoy seemed to take it in
good grace. "I always knew she loved you, Spock. She never made a secret
of that. It was you, Korby, and then me."
Spock is not sure he could be
as gracious if their positions were reversed.
Jim has commented on missing
his chess partner but after asking if Spock was happy to which Spock replied
simply "Yes," he said, "If she can make you admit to an emotion,
then I'm her biggest fan." He seemed truly pleased for him.
"Mmmm."
She moves against him. She is not like T'Pring, quiet in sleep and rousing. She
is an active sleeper and he has learned to move with her. And she wakes under
protest, even when there is no chrono to tell her it is time to get up.
But once she is awake, the
first thing she does is smile at him. A smile he thinks he would be lost
without, even though it has only been a week.
She smiles now and murmurs,
"Good morning," as she pulls him down to her.
He loses himself in her,
marveling as always at how different this is than the more subdued lovemaking
with T'Pring and the almost childlike play he and Leila engaged in under the
spore's influence.
Christine is not passive, is
not childlike, is not concerned with what is proper but only what they both want.
She loves giving and receiving pleasure. He has always known she was caring and
intelligent, but to find they are so compatible sexually makes him resent the
time they have lost.
"I was thinking about
the bond," he says and feels her tense.
"The one you have with
T'Pring?"
"Had. The one I could
have with you." He cannot deny it; there is panic on her face. "I do
not mean right this instant."
She relaxes.
But he feels something deep
inside. Hurt. And...doubt. "Do you not wish to be
bonded?"
"Spock, we've been
together a very short time."
"But we have loved each
other for years."
"From afar. With people
in between us." She moves away slightly, the way she does when she wants
to talk seriously. "We're not the same people."
"We are. We are the same
people who have new experiences."
"Which by definition
means not the same people." She touches his face gently, and he knows it
is as much to soothe as to let him feel her emotions.
She loves him. She is amused.
She is also concerned.
He is pushing too hard.
"I lived thinking I would never have you. That whether the burning came or
not, I would be forever tied to T'Pring. To be freed this way, it is..."
He touches her face, letting his fingers linger on the meld points for a
moment.
"Overwhelming?"
"No. Unexpected and
wonderful. I find it ironic, Christine, that I appear to be more emotionally
available at this moment than you do."
She pulls away even more.
"Perhaps because while you were sitting doing nothing in your purgatorial
Vulcan status quo, I was losing the father of my child and the child itself. I
put my science career on hold to find him."
"And slept with McCoy as
you did."
Her face changes; he is
seeing pure rage and it is unnerving on a countenance he associates with love
and care. "He understood me, Spock."
"Are you saying I do
not?"
"I'm saying that I at
least changed. You just found a new version of me in Leila. Only I bet you
didn't offer her a role as your mistress. I feel sorry for Leila, Spock. Just
another body along the trail." She slips out of bed and gets dressed.
"Do not leave." His
voice is that of a little boy, calling back those who have abandoned him.
"I'm not leaving you,
Spock. I'm leaving this conversation. I'll see you at dinner, okay?"
He is completely off balance,
unsure how to call her back. So he does not try.
She has changed.
She has changed and he is not
sure he likes it.
##
It is no longer a problem to
be discreet. Something has changed between them and when he sees her with
McCoy, standing close the way they always have, it irritates him. He has taken
to sniffing her, to try to see if there is more of McCoy's subtle cologne on
her than there should be.
"What are you
doing?" She looks up at him with weariness. "Are you sniffing
me?"
"Your shampoo is
new." It is true but it is not why he is taking in her scent so deeply.
But it is the right thing to
say. She frowns and says, "Do you like the scent? I'm not sure I do."
"I prefer the one you
used yesterday."
"Yeah, me too. It was
lighter. This is just overpowering." She moves into his arms. "I'm
sorry I've been distant. You're right, we've loved each other for years but we
never had each other, Spock. And as you so like to say every time
I want to try a new pastry in the mess..."
"Having is not so
satisfying a thing as wanting?" He touches her cheek, wanting her to know
that for him, having is intensely satisfying.
"It's just going to take
some time to figure out our rhythm. You know how weird I am about commitment.
Talking about a bond this soon—it really spooked me."
He nods. "Because I have
been thinking of it for so long—as a state desired but unattainable—having it
available to me now is all I have wanted. But I can see how it might not be
immediately attractive to you."
"I'm not saying not
ever. I'm saying not now." And she kisses him, the way she did before, and
it should be as if nothing has changed.
But it has. His dreams for
them have subtly changed. Did he really think he could order her life for her,
bring her in line to fit into his world without making any attempt to fit into
hers? Has he even shown enough interest in hers?
With T'Pring, he had the
benefit of growing up together, knowing her history and her desires. With
Leila, her devotion to him was paramount in the way she approached love. She
wanted him and would have molded herself to him however he wished and called it
happiness.
Christine is neither of these
women. He must remember that.
##
Spock waits for an
opportunity to talk to McCoy when Christine is not in sickbay.
McCoy looks up with a smile.
"Sure is nice to see you without a beard, Spock.
Made you look a little creepy."
"I once wore a
beard—when I was younger." During a most difficult time. And his brother
wore one. It had probably been Sybok he was trying to emulate.
"Well, don't bring it back,
okay?" He leans back. "Why are you darkening my door, Spock? You're
usually only here to pick up Christine."
"I was curious what she
was like in this darker universe."
"Pretty much like you'd
expect our girl to be if you took the morals and ethics away. A goddamn mad
scientist. And she looked amazing in their uniforms." He smiles in a way
Spock does not like. He also does not appreciate McCoy calling Christine
"their girl."
"Were
she and I...?"
"If you were, she was
seriously playing around on you. Couldn't keep her hands off me."
"I see. And did you keep
your hands off her?"
"This wasn't your
Christine, Spock. And I was keeping up a role that Jim told us to play.
Blending in." He smiles in a way that is immediately annoying. "I
never knew what it was like to have all of her. For a moment there, I did. For
what it's worth, the you of that world didn't seem to care when he forced a
meld on me to see who I was and what I'd been up to."
Spock does not look away.
"You are angry."
"I care for her."
He shrugs. "But I knew the score going in. She and I were both sore at
life for the way it had treated us and we found comfort in being pissed off
together. That is probably not the best way to start a lasting relationship. I
miss her but she was never mine."
Spock looks down. "I
appreciate your attitude in all of this."
"I'm sure you do. The
younger me would have challenged you to a duel but seeing what you can do in a
duel, I'm glad I'm the reasonable older me." He grins, but it's a grin
that holds a touch of fear. "You two all right? Seems odd you asking me
about her."
"You were in sickbay. If
she was in sickbay, you would have seen her. It was logical to ask."
"If you say so, my
friend. If you say so."
Later he is with Christine in
his quarters. They are lying quietly because she is tired and has a headache.
Bad enough to get the hypo full of pain meds out.
"How did you find the
other McCoy?"
"The one who groped me
continually? That McCoy?" She laughs in the way that means she is amused
but in a dark way. "I guess his version of me was very into him. He knew
things..." She shook her head.
"What things?"
"Things about my
childhood. Weird that some of it would have been the same." She shifts in
his arms.
"Did the medicine
help?"
"No but you are."
She is sweet tonight despite her pain. This is the Christine he loves most. Sex
is not required, just this closeness.
They could be closer. The
bond would—
No, she has told him not yet,
and he will let it lie.
"Did you not wonder why
it was him and not me who was with you?"
"How do you know a me
without a moral compass wouldn't have you both and be telling you the other one
is only for my career advancement. It seemed from what Nyota said that they
advanced by dark deeds, not good performance."
"Indeed." He pulls
her closer. "Would you tell me if you missed him?"
"Len? I see him every
day. He's drilling medicine into my head. Believe me, I get enough McCoy
time." She kisses him. "Are you jealous?"
"Yes." He sees no
point in hiding the fact.
"I love that." She
cuddles closer and fully relaxes in his arms. "I heard the uniforms were
quite revealing."
"Perhaps you should have
Nyota draw you the schematics and replicate it for our enjoyment?"
She laughs. "Look in
your nightstand drawer."
Sitting above the box of
their pictures, a box he no longer hides, is a basic sketch of the outfit and
Christine's version—even more scandalous. He laughs—a soft puff of air that he
immediately calls back but she has heard it and she laughs
too.
"You approve?"
"I do." He puts the
drawings back in his drawer and closes it, turning to her once again.
"Well, obviously it
won't be tonight but some night, if you've been a very, very good boy..."
"I will be an extraordinarily
good boy." He kisses her gently, rubbing her back the way she likes until
she falls asleep.
He allows himself to smile.
She has done this for him—to please him. To please them both.
It is a wonderful feeling to
be so free.
##
He is tired from the day,
from the operation to save Sarek, from the stress of dealing with his parents
after so long apart—and from the feeling that perhaps now they might finally be
some sort of family again.
Christine comes over and
scans him before she gets into bed.
"I am quite fine."
"Humor me."
He caresses her free hand as
she works. "If you had not found that Rigelian
study, my father would have died."
"I'm good at research.
Better than Len probably. But he's the one who did the surgery." She
smiles. "You're fine. Just tired, I think."
"I am." He lets her
get settled into bed before asking the question that has been troubling him
since the operation ended. "Should I have introduced you as my..."
"The word is girlfriend.
And no, not when you haven't talked to them in years and your father needed
emergency surgery and then you were working on maybe a rapprochement." She
kisses him gently. "But I have to tell you that your mother is very
perceptive. She cornered me."
"She is relentless when
she wants to know something. I could hide nothing from her when I was a
child."
"Yeah, I failed too. She
seemed really happy for us." Her expression changes, and he notices she is
not cuddling in. That they are not touching in any way skin to skin.
"Something troubles you.
And you do not want me reading you."
"You know me."
"I am learning."
"She wanted to know how
we met and I told her about the early years, that I had even met T'Pring. I may
have made a kind of sarcastic remark about my surprise over the durability of a
Vulcan bond after hearing so much about them. Since you guys could just break
it so simply."
He is not sure where she is
going with this line of conversation. He too has often wondered about that.
"She
told me that it only works that way when both bondmates
are psychically adept enough to control the bond. Most humans are not. I test
average, as she does." She meets his eyes. "For her, the bond is
irrevocable. She doesn't control it in any way."
"This cannot be right. I
would know—"
"How would you know?
Would you have asked them about that sort of thing? Once you knew what you and
T'Pring had, wouldn't you just assume they were like you two?"
He nods; she is right. He has
never thought to question the nature of his parents' bond. Then he sees the
look on her face, the...dismay.
"You do not wish to bond
if that is the case, do you?"
She shakes her head slowly.
"To be forever locked in? Spock, maybe, in time, I will. But right now, I
just can't imagine it." She touches his hand, and he knows she is doing it
on purpose, so he can feel the rush of conflicting emotions within her.
"But marriage would be okay. Not today but in the future."
"A Vulcan
bonds, Christine. He does not merely marry."
"Well, what if I was psi
null? Then you couldn't bond with me."
"That would be a
different case. But you are not psi null. I have felt your capability, limited
as it is." He realizes that sounded like an insult. "I mean no
disrespect."
"I know. You're just
being honest. But so am I. I'm not saying I won't change my mind someday, when
we have a track record, when we know and trust each other better."
"You do not trust
me?"
"I wouldn't be with you
without trust, Spock. You know that about me. But to give you my entire
life...? That's a whole other level of trust."
"I see." Again she has made him feel off balance.
"I bet Leila's looking
pretty damn good right about now. She'd do it, wouldn't she?"
He nods. "Probably
without a thought. She wanted everything."
"There's a difference
between wanting everything and giving everything away." She looks down.
"Is this a deal breaker for you?"
"You are what I want. You
are what I have wanted for years. I will adjust my expectations. And perhaps in
time your reservations will abate. I respect your choice."
She finally cuddles into him
and to his shock starts to cry. He crushes her to him, stroking her hair,
unsure how to help her. "I thought this would be it. I thought you'd
finally realize I'm too fucked up to love."
"We all carry
baggage."
"Yeah
but some of us pack it worse." She kisses him, and they are frantic kisses
until he slows her down.
"I love you, Christine.
Had I known the nature of the bond when it is with a human, I would have
understood the problem it might present for us. I will do further study.
Perhaps there are mitigations to allow more control on the human partner's
part. I highly doubt my father would have looked into such a thing."
"You'd do that for
me?"
"I would do anything for
you."
##
He has studied the texts; he
has talked to old teachers, trusted mentors. There is nothing to indicate a way
to mitigate the nature of the bond exists. He has told Christine this.
He could not tell if she was
disappointed or relieved.
They lie together now, on her
bed because she wanted to get something from her closet and they never managed
to leave once she showed him what it was. He might abhor the morals of the dark
universe they crossed paths with, but its uniforms certainly prompted a
response in him. Or her modifications of what had already been a very skimpy
outfit had done the trick. Either way, they lie exhausted in bed.
"I would like to be
closer to you."
She laughs. "We're
pretty close."
"I mean mentally. A
meld."
She actually pulls away.
"And switch bodies? Uh uh."
He allows himself a smile.
"That was more than a meld. It was also ill advised since both T'Pring and
I were probably not willing to share at that point to the level that ritual
requires. This is much simpler. I did one with La'an during the Gorn attack. That was for a specific reason and limited in
scope. This would be a more general sharing."
"So
you'd see everything?"
"No, it is a sharing,
not research." He strokes her hair. "For a human, you are so
guarded."
"I know. Okay, I'm
game."
He puts his fingers on her
meld points and she smiles and pushes them deeper. "You've done this
before. Touched me here. Did you want to meld at those times?"
"Probably."
"Did you and
T'Pring?"
"Not after the katra
incident. And barely before. I believe we never fully trusted each other."
"I trust you."
He begins the process,
feeling her open up to him in a way that surprises him. That gives him joy.
"Awww,
I can feel how happy you are."
"I am pleased to be
sharing in this way." He kisses her.
"Wait, I can feel you
kissing me like I'm you but I can still feel it from my perspective too."
He can feel her immediate
arousal and a sense of mischief. "Yes, it can be used during sex."
"Oh, yes, please."
He strengthens the meld so he
can remove his hand, so he can hold her and make her writhe beneath him—he
comes when she does, the sensation of her pleasure overpowering him.
"Holy shit, Spock.
You've been holding out on me." She is breathing hard but smiling giddily.
"It is not always this
way. It requires two minds to be in sync, to have trust, to...love."
"I do love you."
Her statement echoes between them, words turning to mental notes, and she
smiles and closes her eyes. "Get inside me now."
He does as she orders. This
time she passes out as he comes. He wakes her gently, and she clutches him,
trembling.
"Was it too much?"
he asks, unsure if he has pushed her too far.
"No. I mean I don't
think I'd want to do it every day. But, no. It was wonderful."
He eases the connection between
them, until it is almost gone, just a comforting hum. "This is what the
bond felt like. An awareness that T'Pring was with me even when far away. I
could not tell what she was doing or thinking. But if she was in distress, I
believe I would have known it."
"Could she block you if
she wanted?"
"She could. She did, as
soon as she made the ultimatum. I never felt her in my mind again. Not until
the burning."
"But
I wouldn't be able to do that."
"Would
you want to?"
"What
if we fell apart?"
"Why
would we fall apart?"
"I
don't know." She buries her head in his shoulder. "Spock, I'm super
vulnerable right now after the meld. Maybe we should just cuddle and not
talk."
"I
have moved you too much? If you feel vulnerable?"
"Me
being guarded didn't start with Roger and the baby. I'm used to having things I
love ripped away from me. When I open up, when I think that this time I'll be safe and loved, then it all blows up. I guess,
over time, I learned to blow it up first. Hurt before I could get hurt."
"I
will not hurt you."
"Let's
just cuddle, okay?"
He does what she says. But he
is confused. He felt her pleasure—her sense of connection with him. Why is she
now pulling away?
She falls asleep and he is
still pondering the question.
##
He sees her dismay as he
dodders around sickbay, working as quickly as he can with her and Doctor
Wallace for a cure. He stops her for a moment, his hand on hers, feeling panic.
"We will prevail,
Christine."
"Go back to work,
Spock." But her voice is gentle, her eyes tender.
His hearing is still good
enough to hear Wallace say to her, "You love a Vulcan. And he loves you.
Interesting."
"Things happened."
Christine sighs.
"I read one of your
papers on genetic manipulation. It was brilliant."
"I've read many of yours
too."
Wallace laughs. "We can
have a mutual admiration society." She pauses and there is only the sound of
the two women working, then she says, "Actually, I'm surprised Jim hasn't
snatched you up. You're exactly his type. A brilliant scientist and one on his
ship."
"Well, I'm with his best
friend. Puts a damper on the snatching." She laughs in a way Spock enjoys.
"Also, I fell in love with Spock a long time ago. Jim didn't stand a
chance."
"Jim, is it?"
"Again, I'm with his
best friend. Comes with certain perks. Getting to know him and use his first
name included."
Spock feels a rush of
satisfaction. His friend and his woman are compatible. He does not think
T'Pring would have liked Jim. And it was clear what Jim thought of Leila.
"But is he your type? My
Jim?"
"Oh, I imagine he's
everyone's type." It is a safe answer, a diplomatic one. That pleases Spock
too. She will do well when he introduces her formally on Vulcan.
If he does not die of old age
first.
His tricorder pings and he says, "The last one you did. It is showing results on
the test cells."
They rush over and he feels
Christine's hands on his shoulders as they all watch the results. The cells are
reverting back to the way they should appear given the real ages of the landing
party.
"We've got it,"
Wallace says. "I'll just go get Doctor McCoy."
Christine slides around and
into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. "You've still got it.
Gray hair and lines be damned."
"I have you. That is all
I need." He strokes her face gently. "I do not want to lose
you."
"I'd be losing you. Left
here without you. I don't want that." She kisses him tenderly. "What
would happen if we were bonded and one of us died?"
"The other would feel
it. A debilitating surge of pain. An emptiness where before there was
unity."
"That on top of grief.
It sounds horrible, Spock."
"Think of it as many
years of connection brought to an abrupt end. Do not focus solely on the
end."
"Very wise
approach."
Wallace walks back in and
smiles at them. "Who knew Vulcans were so tactile."
"I imagine there is much
you do not know of Vulcans, Doctor." He eases Christine off and tries to
get up in his normal effortless manner.
It takes him two tries.
He will be glad to be his
proper age again.
##
Spock watches as Christine
gives Jim a final once over. "You're good as new, sir. Whatever Sargon and
Thalassa did to make you whole, it's sticking."
Jim grins at her, an easy,
trusting look. "Good."
She leans down and
whispers—but not softly enough Spock can't hear, "So are you and Doctor
Mulhall and me and Spock going to double date?"
"We are not, Chris.
Please never say that again."
Spock bites back a frown. He
does not remember Jim calling her that before. "Chris?"
She looks at him. "He's
always called me that. Since before us. Well, not before we met, obviously, but
since I talked him into letting me back on this ship."
"You have never told me
to call you that."
"Because you called Pike
that. It would have gotten confusing. Also I like the
way you say 'Christine.'"
Jim sits up. "Can't I
have a pet name for her, Spock? Or are you going to tell me to stop being
friends with your woman?" He's grinning in the easy way he has, and Spock
senses no guile in him.
He also thinks Jim is doing
everything he can to put emotional distance between himself and Doctor Mulhall,
who is on the far biobed with McCoy looking after her. "I have no issue
with it." He glances at Christine and before she can say anything,
"Not that if I did that would change anything. Christine is her own
person."
"Very good, Spock."
She actually gives him a quick kiss in the limited public area that is sickbay.
He finds, to his surprise,
that he likes it. He likes her kissing him in front of Jim and—he looks
around—yes and in front of McCoy, who walks over.
"I guess, since we all
thought you were dead, I'll not get on her case over kissing a patient."
"I am not a
patient."
He grins and pushes him to a
biobed. "That's where you're wrong, my friend. Now, let's see if Henoch
left any lasting damage."
Christine grins at him and he
holds his hand out to her. She comes over, holding on tightly.
"Let go of him. His
heartrate goes up when you touch him."
"That's what all the
boys say." She winks at Spock and murmurs so low he knows only he can hear
it, "But you're the only boy for me."
He relaxes and lets McCoy
work, never looking away from her. Being held by her, safe in her mind, which
was far more logically inclined than he has ever given her credit for,
was...indescribable. Closer even then a bond.
"Okay, get out of here,
you two."
They do not wait around to
see how Jim will deal with Doctor Mulhall. Spock expects she will find herself off
the ship as Doctor Noel did or assigned to Gamma as Lieutenant Moreau has been.
Jim does not allow himself to be distracted by crewmembers. No matter how much
he might have enjoyed kissing them—or their dark universe counterparts.
Christine takes his hand in
the lift, not letting go even though people get on. He does not mind the looks:
she is his, let her show it to the whole crew for all he cares.
He realizes some of what he
feels is euphoria left over from being with her so intimately. With no barriers—unguarded.
"I appreciate your
agreeing to host my consciousness," he says as they leave the lift and
head to his quarters.
"I didn't. I was—I was
under Henoch's thrall. But it was Vulcan—the power he used. Partly. Making me
do things."
"That was him. Not
me."
"I know. But no, they
knew he'd read me, I guess. So they put you inside me
without my knowledge." She smiles up at him. "I'm okay with it by the
way. Losing you would have killed me."
"Did he hurt you.
Physically I mean. Sexually?"
"He didn't have time.
But...I think he might have gotten around to it. There was a part of me still
aware—still fighting. He'd touch me here and I'd stop fighting." She lies
her finger just above her eyebrows.
"That is not a Vulcan
touch point. Whatever he did to you, it was not because he was in my body, but
because they had great power themselves."
"Really?"
"Yes."
They fell onto his bed as
soon as they got into his quarters, removing just enough clothes to be
together.
"I've never felt closer
to you, Spock."
"I think, after the
liberties Henoch took with you, Sargon was giving us both a gift."
"I think so too." She
kisses him and they both enjoy what is left of the resonance from their sharing
as their bodies find the rhythm they have perfected
over months now.